Never Not [Taekook]

NN 42

Taehyung.

I slowly get up from bed when my phone started ringing. I groaned and snatched it away from its charger. I lazily drag my feet towards my bathroom and do my rituals.

I answered my phone and put it in speaker mode.

“Yeah?” i greeted as i put an ample amount of toothpaste onto my toothbrush.

“Where are you right now, Kim Taehyung?” i sigh when i heard Yoongi-hyung’s voice.

Here he goes again..

Yoongi-hyung and Jiminie didn't know where i was. I never told them even if they keep asking for my address.

I am still not ready to face either of them.

“I’m doing fine, hyung. Don't need to worry about me” i said while brushing my teeth.

It will always be like this. He will call me first thing in the morning and ask for my address. Sometimes he would always use that monotone voice but it wouldn't affect me anymore.

“I am asking where are you? I am relieved that you are doing fine but what i want you to tell me is where the fuck are you?” i could feel how he grit his teeth in every syllables.

“Don't worry the food here are good but im on a diet. I’m taking good care of myself and i always make sure to put double locks on my door–”

“I am not asking about that, Kim. How am i going to calm down? How am i not going to worry when you leave the house without us knowing? I can tolerate everything, Taeh. But this? God will forgive me but i’ll rip off a neck if something happens to you”

I sigh and get rid of the toothpaste. I gargled and clean my mouth using a clean white towel.

“I’m sorry for leaving without short notice. It's just that......something really unexpectedly happened and....i don't think i can handle the heaviness it brought if i would still choose to stay there. I’m all good and fine, hyung. But i can't really tell you where i am now. I’m sorry” as soon as i said those words, i end the call and stares at my reflection on the mirror.

Red eyes, heavy bags under my eyes, red nose and cheeks, disheveled hair and messy clothes.

This is not the Kim Taehyung i knew. This is not me. This is far from the Taehyung everyone knew.

But i can't just set aside the pain, i can't just ignore it.

It hurts. Until now.

I already confess. I did it without hesitation and doubts. I did it willingly.

Just to make him realize that he had been hurting me

If i didn't confess. Would he know that i am hurting? No. He won't. Because he only thinks about his wedding. That's all in his mind.

The thought of having Jessie for the rest of his life.

I want to be mad. I want to shout. Why the fuck is this so unfair?! I never did anything wrong in my life! I just loved my best friend that i supposed to not!

I want to be angry at him. I want to lash out at him for making me feel so unwanted, unlove. I want to beat him for making me feel so terrible.

BUT

but i also need him. I need him right now. I need his presence. I need to hear his voice. I need to see his smiles. I need his arms to wrap around my body.

I want to be mad at him and completely kick him out of my life BUT i want him, i need him. Only him.

I HATE YOU SO MUCH JEON JUNGKOOK FOR MAKING ME MISS YOU DESPITE THE PAIN YOU'RE GIVING ME! DAMN YOU BUNNY LITTLE ASSHOLE!

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Here goes the other chapter i promised.

I hope you enjoyed reading this chap.

As soon as my midterm ends, i’ll be updating again.  Though it won't be a daily update. I’ll still going to plan for my updating scheds since im also writing stories on facebook. So yeah?

I hope you did enjoy and pls i need your feedback.

Thank you!

Daily reminder!

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