𝐒𝐓𝐀𝐑𝐑𝐘 𝐍𝐈𝐆𝐇𝐓 ➪ 𝐕𝐈𝐂𝐓𝐎𝐑𝐈𝐀 𝐃𝐄 𝐀𝐍𝐆𝐄𝐋𝐈𝐒

XXXIX. STRANGERS

[TW - SLIGHT MENTIONS OF PANIC ATTACKS AND DIVORCE]

It's interesting how much pain something could give you in such a short amount of time, how much it could destroy you.

One second you're doing well, dating the love of your life and the next you're absolutely destroyed, not wanting to live anymore because of who you thought loved and cared about you but really they ran away after the first bump.

Enzo had called me later yesterday, trying to persuade me to come to school to tomorrow, which is now today. At first, I disagreed but after he told me Victoria isn't coming and it'd be good to at least come in on one day because alk my teachers are worrying about me, I told him I could try to survive this day.

There were only three lessons today so maybe it wasn't going to be too bad. First I had Music, then I had English and then Art. I could survive that. Hopefully.

I tried to fall asleep for the first time in many days but I kept turning and tossing so I didn't get any sleep. I got up very early in the morning and got ready.

I brushed my hair out that hadn't been brushed out for a few days and put it in a low, loose bun. I put on a pair of flared trousers and a pale grey hoodie, I put my black converses on with my bag and just went down and left the house for the first time in days. I left a note, I didn't want to worry my family. I left it on the fridge where everyone could see it.

I left for school. Enzo convinced me to try to go. So, don't worry, I didn't go missing and neither did I run away.
Althea.

I didn't care that I was pale and had dark circles under my eyes. I didn't care about anything, I just wanted to get this horrible day over and done with.

I walked around places near my house and when I reached the park it was completely hour due to the early hour. I opened the gate and walked in and sat on the bench that destroyed me around a week ago.

I sat down and watched the sun rise. It reminded me of the sun setting when Victoria broke up with me. I felt tears gather in my eyes for, what felt like, the millionth time in the past couple days.

"Fuck." I whispered, rubbing my eyes but that just made it worse.

I don't think I've ever lived through so many panic attacks as I have through the past few days. At least two a day, not great.

I hate emotions eventhough it felt like lately I was just empty.

I stared ahead of me as the tears fell silently down my face. I ignored the opening of the gate and just stared ahead if me until I felt someone sit next to me.

I turned to see someone I didn't recognize. He was around my age probably a little older.

"Don't ask questions." he said. "Just tell me what happened."

"How can I trust you?" I asked quietly after a while of silence. "I don't know you."

"I won't tell anyone." he shrugged. "Everyone has their own problems."

"Nice to meet you." I said and he nodded. "There, that was a proper greeting."

"Hey, sometimes spilling your feelings to a complete stranger doesn't need a greeting." he defended himself, putting his hands up in surrender. "Now, just talk. I'm here to listen."

"God, where do I start?" I asked. "OK, well, um, my parents have been shouting at each other for months it had been haunting me everywhere and because my older brother wasn't there I was the one they let their anger out on and I have exams coming up and one day a couple weeks ago I, uh, I went to to tell them to shut up and they told me they were getting a divorce. I had never been good with emotions so, naturally, I ran away and didn't come back for a whole day which, for me, isn't even a lot but my family acted out. I got back and my friends were there with my brother who had returned from Canada where he was studying. We got into a fight because he got angry at me for running away and then I shouted at him some of my emotions and the problems that I had told no one about in front of three of my friends I also told him about the divorce which he didn't know. I'm really affected by the divorce just because my parents taught me to believe in love. Then, I tried to run away but the girl I had feelings for, Victoria, followed me and then I told her everything and well things happened and we started dating. Her father is very homophobic and she lost her mother a couple years ago so her fathers opinion meant a lot to her. We decided to date in secret but then we told my brother and then we told her sister then we lastly told our four friends, Ethan, Damiano, Enzo and Thomas. For the month and a bit we were dating I fell so deeply in love with her I was scared of it really. She was my ray of hope in the dark hole I was in until a week ago she broke up with me because her father found out about us and told her too. I haven't been leaving my room, multiple panic attacks a day, not communicating to people and not going to school. No sleep, no nothing. It all destroyed me and yesterday my beat friend, Enzo, convinced me to go to school today and now here I am spilling my life to a complete stranger I had just met." I chuckled dryly.

He raised his eyebrows and let out a breath.

"And I thought I had it bad." he said. "Wow, I'm so sorry."

"I'll get over it one day hopefully. It's not been easy on me lately." I shrugged.

"I know I'm a stranger but, can I hug you? I think you need a proper hug." he said and I smiled lightly, nodding my head at him. He hugged me like I've never been hugged before, I felt a warmth from him just flow into mine.

"You're really restoring my faith in humanity." I said and he laughed as we both backed away.

"I think you need someone to talk to." he said, scribbling some numbers on a piece of paper he found in his pocket. "Here." he passed it to me, it was a phone number. His phone number. "Give me a call anytime you need someone to talk to."

"Thank you." I whispered, looking at the little paper in front of me. "I appreciate me."

"No problem." he nodded at me, smiling. "I'm Leo, by the way."

"Althea."