ULTRAVIOLET [✔]

[22] The reconciling

JENNIE POV

I sat down on the wooden fairy bed, pulling my legs up and hiding my face in my knees. I curled into a little ball so Lisa was no longer able to see my face, should she look my way. The tears that stung behind my eyes ever since Chaeyoung's outburst, were set free in secret. I tried not to make a sound, crying silently and feeling utterly horrible. I heard Lisa shuffling around the small room before sitting down on the ground opposite of the bed that I was on.

 Then she did something I have never seen her do before. A small ball of light appeared. Much like the one the message was hidden in earlier. Only Lisa's was a lot smaller and dimmer. I saw it through the tiny gap between my knees, blurred out by my tears. Her magical light dimly lit the dark fairy housing we were in. I didn't even know she could do something like that.

From the outside we could hear our friends talking and moving about but neither of us made a move to leave. Even though we could.

Jisoo couldn't really stop us if we decided to disobey her.

Both of us were silent for a good ten minutes. My head was reeling with everything that had happened. My repressed feelings for the faye girl and Chaeyoung's harsh words about us not knowing how to love each other. 

Did I really love her? Was that what made me so afraid of the feelings I harboured deep within?

"I didn't mean to yell at you...." Lisa's voice drifted over to me suddenly and it made me snap back out of my messy mind. I took in a shaky breath but did not lift my head. 

"I'm sorry Nini."

I faintly shook my head. "No. You have every right to yell at me..." I told her, trying to hide the tears in my voice but I knew I didn't quite succeed. 

"No, I don't. I overreacted." Lisa's voice was quite calm but it carried a deep sadness. "It's actually nice to know that you are capable of being jealous..." she carried on very quietly. "I like to believe that it means that I do mean something to you after all..."

That made me look up and Lisa's eyes met mine in the semi-darkness. "Lisa... you think you don't mean anything to me?" I asked in a shaky whisper. My heart ached at the thought.

"Well... I don't know... you only come to me when you want something. And that's mostly one night and then you disappear again... what do you expect me to think?" The fairy girl did not cry like I did. But the sadness in her voice made invisible stones drop in my stomach.

"You know that's not true..." I felt my heart jump into my throat as I struggled for words to say to her. To express what I really felt without fearing to collapse from the weight of this conversation.

"You feel it everytime I trigger your powers, don't you?" 

She shook her head hardly noticable, her eyes never straying from mine. "You locked me out. Lately, I don't feel anything from you... at least not what you do or do not feel for me..." she explained softly. There was hardly any judgement in her voice like there should have been. "I still feel you being happy or sad, or frustrated or whatever though." 

My heartbeat felt uncomfortable in my throat. "I locked you out?" I was suprised and also a bit shocked by her revelation. Yes, I have been keeping a distance between us but I did not realize I was capable of locking my feelings away from Lisa's powers too. Maybe I unconsciously did it to protect myself. But I certainly didn't do it on purpose.

Lisa nodded and pressed her lips together tightly. I could tell that she wanted to say something more but kept it to herself on second thought. She stayed silent, just looking at me. I averted my eyes. Lisa's magic light was hovering between us, about one meter off the ground. It was calmly bouncing a little in the air. I stared at it for a second.