No Regrets, Only Memories

Together

Daniel

My eyes didn't fully open before I was off the mattress and into the bathroom. Even my own throw up still tasted of vodka and beer as it all left my system, a reminder that a few tiny sandwiches and a handful of crisps wasn't enough food when an evening of drinking was happening. It took what felt like hours before I stopped, my body lurching as it attempted to rid itself of the poison it had consumed the night before. With nothing left though, all I could do was dry heave for a few moments before taking a deep breath and leaning my head against my forearm on the toilet bowl.

As much as the morning after carried regret with a heavy night of partying, there was still a small smile on my face as I stood slowly and moved to grab my toiletries bag. I closed the door, not wanting to wake up Maeve just yet to experience the pain I had just yet by turning on the light in the bathroom. Looking at myself in the mirror, a gasp left my lips as I finally saw myself even through sleep blurry eyes.

It was clear that Maeve and I had participated in some extra-curriculars upon our return from the party last night. My entire upper body was a Van Gogh style mix of purple hues and red scratch marks, a dead giveaway that I had someone in my room last night. It also meant that I was at risk of not wearing any tank tops for the foreseeable future. What really worried me though was what Maeve looked like if I was like this.

Maeve answered the question for me, barreling into the bathroom to repeat the actions I had done just moments before despite the fact the door had been closed. My tooth brush made a dull thud as it hit the edge of the marble sink, my movements slow and bulky from the remnant alcohol still in my system as I kneeled down next to my girlfriend to hold her hair back in an attempt to prevent any vomit from getting onto her hair. The action was too late though, she clearly had not eaten as well as her body convulsed with each wave of sickness. A grimace made its way to my face as I soothingly tried to rub her bare back. Her own hands were preoccupied with the iron grip she currently had on the edge of the toilet seat. Of course, my own headache had started to set in, a violent thud that made watching Maeve's actions hard to watch in fear of me repeating my own.

"I'm sorry babe..." I whispered as I closed my eyes and continued to try and soothe her through the sickness.

"I'm never drinking again." Echoed as she spoke a few moments later. I wanted to laugh, but my own pain prevented me.

"It's Ferrari's fault. I don't know how, but it is." I joked, eyes still closed as Maeve entered the dry heaving phase with nothing else to empty from her stomach.

"Not the time for jokes. I legit feel like I might die."

She pushed back, sitting up a bit before leaning her drained body against mine. I slid my body down farther, now against the cabinets as I gently held her in my arms. Unfortunately, my fears were confirmed as she had similar markings along all of the parts of her I could see.

"What happened last night?" She asked as she rested her head against my shoulder.

As gross as it was, I still wrapped my arms around her. We both smelled horribly of throw up and alcohol. There was no going around the fact that it had happened and we were going to deal with it though.

"Well first of all, alcohol. Second, free alcohol." I winced as I laughed, my head still pounding. Maeve still chuckled despite the deep inhale that told me she was also in pain.

"This is more than alcohol,"She weakly lifted her arm, briefly showing the forming bruises along her bicep to me. They were perfect handprints, my handprints," I don't remember much of it though."

I didn't respond, regret seated deep in my already tumultuous stomach at the fact that I had marked her up and we didn't even really remember it. We had never talked about anything involving what we wanted out of our physical relationship. This felt like a line crossed in more ways than one, something I should be begging for forgiveness for.