My King Mates

Chapter Thirty Four

I open my eyes but close them from the brightness. I wait a couple of seconds before I open them again. When I open my eyes I look to Sawyer's side of the bed and notice I'm alone. I don't like this waking up alone. I've woken up alone my entire life and now that I have someone I can wake up next to every morning I want it to stay that way.

I sat up ready to start my day until I remember yesterday. That put a damper on my already upset mood. Wait is that why Sawyer left before I woke up? Did he go to find Alpha Ryan to tell him he'll take him up on his offer? My heart hurts at the thought.

With the feeling of a tear rolling down my cheek, I get out of bed and head towards the bathroom. It hurts but if that is true I need to continue on and act like him leaving me doesn't bother me. Without picking out an outfit for today I walk into the bathroom to take a shower. I turn on the water to the perfect hot temperature then strip out of my clothing before I get into the hot water. As I washed I let the tears freely fall down my face. This is the only time I'll allow myself to feel this pain and to cry about it. Once I leave this bathroom I need to act like I'm fine and everything is okay.

I finished with my shower and step out. I wrap myself in a towel. I look at myself in the mirror. It does look like I've been crying but thankfully no one will be seeing my face until I look normal. I open the door and walk into the bedroom but stop when I find Sawyer sitting on the bed. What is he doing here?

He looks open when he notices me standing in front of him. He stands up and tries to walk up to me but I take a step back. A hurt look crosses his face when I see me stepping away from him.

"Babe, what's wrong? I could feel the hurt through our bond" he tells me.

"Nothing," I tell him. I turn away from him and walk towards the closet.

"Nothing? What I feel from the bond doesn't feel like nothing. And it looks like you've been crying" Sawyer says as he follows me.

"I haven't" is all I tell him. I blink my eyes trying to keep the tears in. I don't know why but when I'm with him I have a difficult time keeping my emotions in check. "Amber I know something is wrong can you just tell me so I can make you feel better?" Sawyer asks frustration clear in his voice.

I stop walking and turn towards him. "You want to know what's wrong?" I ask he nods. "Yes, baby I do," he tells me. "You're going to take Alpha Ryan's offer aren't you?" I ask struggling to keep my tears in. I can't let him see how weak I am. Sawyer looks at me in shock. "Do you think I'm going to leave you just like that? Amber, I will never leave you. You are my one and only. If I have to tell you every hour every day for the rest of my life I will. I love you and I'm not going anywhere I promise" Sawyer tells me.

So I may feel a tad stupid now for earlier. Sawyer walks up to me and pulls me into a tight hug. "I'm sorry" I mumbled into his shoulder. "No, you have nothing to be sorry for. They got into your head. That isn't on you. I should have stayed this morning to make sure you were alright" he tells me.

"Why did you leave?" I ask

"I wanted to spend the day with you so I woke up early to do some work. I don't like falling behind. I was hoping to be back before you woke up but when I felt your feeling through the bond I got worried and hurried back." He tells me.

I pull away from the hug and I look at the face of the man I love. I study him. Swayer looks down at me with a shy smile on his lips. "Why are you looking at me like that?" He asks. "I made a fool out of myself once again," I tell him. Sawyer looks at me confused. "Why do you say that?" He asks.

I shrug "from earlier thinking you'd leave me and all. I know you wouldn't. No other woman could make you feel the way I make you feel. Sawyer, can I ask you a question?" I ask.