saudade | s.j.

four

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Y/N's POV

I wake up around six and immediately head to the gym to work out. I spend two hours working out and thinking constantly about the kiss that Scarlett and I shared last night. After working out, I head upstairs to the kitchen and decide to make pancakes for breakfast. Maybe we can take Rose to the park today and get ice cream. As I flip my last pancake I hear footsteps coming down the stairs. I look and see Scarlett and Rose heading for the front door.

"But momma can we stay longer please?" Rose pleads and tries to escape her mother's grasp. Her big blue eyes are on the verge of tears and Scarlett isn't even paying attention.

"Put your shoes on please and let's go." I hear Scarlett and she sounds tired. I come around the corner and make my presence known to both of them.

"What's going on? I just finished breakfast, why don't you eat something," I ask nervously.

I stand in the doorway hoping that they will stay longer...too bad we don't have the same idea.

"No. We need to go. Bye."

She didn't even make eye contact with me before slamming the door in front of me and pulling out of the driveway quickly. I scream out of frustration. How could I be so stupid to think she would give me a chance. Just another straight woman abusing my feelings. I go upstairs and strip my bed. I don't even want to smell her right now. As I load the sheets into the washer I realize she left with my clothes on. Why would she do that? I start the washer and storm out of the room to find my phone. I calm myself down before beginning my text.

Hey, I don't know what happened but I won't say anything. You were just a little intoxicated and we were talking about something vulnerable. I hope we can still be friends, you're an amazing person. It's not a big deal I promise. :)

I send my text and immediately receive a response. She must've been texting for a minute trying to find her words.

Y/N. It was a mistake, that whole night was and I'd rather never speak about it again. I'm not interested in you so let's try to avoid the play family environments. It would be better to only hang out in public or on set to avoid these situations again. Thanks.

I feel so embarrassed. I can't believe it ever crossed my mind that she possibly liked me. Fuck. She basically called me a mistake. I could feel myself on the verge of tears for some reason. I don't understand why this is having such an effect on me. I run-up to my room and bawl for hours.

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Three weeks later

I need to go talk to someone. I haven't left my house since the incident. I wake up to read my script and workout, then I watch sad movies all day. Her words are starting to eat away at me mentally and if I let it get any further it won't be good. I pick up my phone and call Robert. "Hello dearest what's going on?"

I smile at his choice of nickname for me today and start to speak. "I need to talk to someone and you're sadly the first person that came to mind." He gasps at my statement and I chuckle at his dramatics.

"You don't sound too well. Meet me at the studio and we can talk. I'll tell security you're coming since you don't have an official car tag yet or ID." I pump my fist in the air to his response and head to the bathroom to freshen up.

"Ok see you in twenty Junior." I hang up before he could reprimand me for calling him 'Junior' and start to get ready.

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I've made it to the studio and notice another car parked next to Robert's. I sigh out of relief that it's not Scarlett's and head inside. I walk over to his office and open the door to an empty room with a notecard on the desk.