Hotshot? ~{Tomboo}~

~{Chapter 28}~

Tommy POV

I sat on the bleachers with Tubbo, silent.

We're never silent. We always have sonething to talk about, and we're always comfortable with each other.

I cleared my throat, "Tubbo....I'm sorry."

"What for?" He asked.

"Well....weren't you rejected?" I asked.

He nodded, "Yes, but that has nothing to do with you, so you have no reason to apologize Tommy. He only likes you. I know you don't like him, and I know for sure you'd never betray me for some dude."

Ofcourse he trusts me....and that makes this so much harder and scarier- knowing I broke that trust.

I took a deep breath, "Tubbo....I- I haven't been honest." I took a shaky breath, "With anyone. With myself or you..."

"Tommy, just cause feelings weren't reciprocated because he fell for you, doesn't make it your fault." He sighed, "You get them all Tommy. They all fall for you."

I sniffled, "I like Ranboo."

Finally.

I admitted it to myself.

And now I'd admitted it to Tubbo.

His eyes went wide and he gulped, "Since when?"

"I'm not sure....I just do." I replied.

"But...you were always encouraging me. You were always encouraging my thoughts of him liking me. I thought you were rooting for me and Ranboo..." he said sounding completely confused.

"In a way...I was. I wanted him to fall for you instead, so that he could forget about me. So that......I could forget about him." I frowned.

"So you bottled up your feelings for me?" He asked.

I nodded, "In some ways, yes."

He smiled a little, "That's incredibly sweet of you, but you should've told me you liked him too."

My eyes got teary, "Tubbo....I bottled up my feelings and didn't admit that I liked him, but I couldn't help myself from other stuff. I'm sorry."

"Other stuff?" He asked.

"Tubbo I'm sorry! But, I can't lose you!" I cried.

He teared up, "Tommy, what's 'other stuff'?"

"Please......your my only guarantee and if I lose you I have nothing." I begged.

"Tommy. What is 'other stuff'?" He asked a little more serious toned.

"I kissed him." I said not able to make eye  contact.

"Oh...well, that's alright. I'm sure he pushed it on you and you just caved. It's understandable." He said sounding sad.

"No Tubbo. I kissed him...I let him kiss me. We did it all the time. Whenever we want, we kiss each other. It wasn't a one time thing." I said beginning to softly cry again.

Tubbo breathed uneasily, "B- But why?!"

"Cause I like him....and he likes me." I shrugged.

"You knew I liked him! So why!?" He cried.

"I-.....don't know why." I cried.

"What else? There's no way you just kissed." He said sniffling.

"We made out several times. We hold hands, have sleepovers- ,but we've never done it. And.....he gave me a hickey once...uhm I think that's it?" I said unable to look at him...disgusted with myself.