Camp Idiot - The absolute twits

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At their camp Ilus and the members heard strange frequencies. Ilus scratched his ear and mumbled: "I remember owls sounding different...". Dexter thought out loud: "That sounded more like a coyote". Shark guessed: "Big bird...?". Henry jumped: "BEAR!". Zigz looked at him confused: "That was anything but a bear". Another member from the group warned: "Chef, there's a bear-!". Before he could finish, the three missed boys came running in high speed and had the bear breathing in their necks. At the camp everyone jumped to the side. Ilus even grabbed Henry and pushed Dexter into the chase. Just barely he was able to crouch down small enough to not get run over.

Lucky advised panicking: "No matter who - make very loud noises that hurt in the ears! Now!". Henry couldn't think of anything better than to reach the highest note his voice could pitch. And that did hurt everyone's ears. Even the bear, he twitched and ran away. The boys could finally stop sprinting for their lives and fell exhausted to the ground. Dexter got up again and pointed at Ilus: "Bad karma's awaiting you!". He stomped to the treehouse and repeated from the window: "Bad karma!". With his success Henry smiled: "That actually worked". But right afterwards he started to cough: "Water, please! I just went through pubescent voice cracks again!". Shark brought him a bottle, the water inside it they cooked up from a nearby brook. Zigz noticed: "Is Ilus alright?". Ilus was still lying on the ground not moving.

Shark jolted him. Ilus did get up immediately, but he talked very loudly: "Is it gone?!". Henry put the bottle down and asked him: "Are you okay?". He questioned, almost shouting: "Are you just moving your mouth or are you pretending to speak?!". Clueless Henry looked at the others: "What's up now?". From old memories Zigz concluded: "I once had something similar to that, I was sixteen then. It was during a band practice. We turned an amplifier up too much and I had loss of hearing". Ilus spoke - shouted - to Henry: "Do I have something in my ears?! It feels like they're stuffed with cotton!". Nodding Zigz took Ilus by his arm: "Fishhead should be in one of the tents farther back. We'll be back soon". "What blind fish stick robbed a bank?!", Ilus was confused. Koi felt adressed: "Did he just insult me?". Lucky tapped his shoulder placatory.

~~~

"Tell me a date", Lucky requested. Koi already had his eyes closed and mumbled half asleep: "The derfth sixty-ninth two-hundred before t-rex...". He rolled his eyes: "A real date?". "I dunno... Thirteenth of June...", Koi mumbled and turned away, "Now let me sleep...". "That's your birthday", he mentioned smiling to which he didn't get a response anymore. Also Lucky turned away: "That fits...".

~~~

Zigz complained after Ilus rushed him out of his sleep: "Now you've destroyed my sleep rhythm...". "I don't mind building up the parcour in the night and also running through it when we can't see shit anymore", Ilus didn't give in. Through a few tricks of their doctor Ilus was able to more or less hear again. Only sometimes he couldn't hear anymore. Dexter asked: "Wouldn't that actually make more sense as you're probably going to fight against this strange guy at night?". Ilus was about to answer him, Henry directly protected him: "He's right". Ilus muttered: "I love you, but stop that". Lucky stepped inbetween: "Chef, before we'll start the training, could we talk in private?". "Sure", he nodded and they distanced from the camp.

Lucky made it short: "Koi wishes for attention, so we should give it to him. Until now we always managed birthdays that they were only celebrated with closest friends and coworkers. But now we've also celebrated christmas, so how about a new holiday?". "You want to play god and originate a new holiday?", he raised an eyebrow. "Just for us. Around summer time there are only so few holidays anyway. So, my suggestion: Koi-Day", he explained, "And everybody from the gang should celebrate it, because I'm sure that it would help Koi. Something like a second christmas and we're cheering for our personal hacker Jesus". "Oh, whatever", Ilus shrugged, "Have fun, telling the others. I have to take care of the camp. Or you'll wait until all-". Already Lucky went back and stood up on a branch to announce the news. Zigz was unhappy about it: "I want my own holiday too! Food-mas!". Shaking his head laughing Ilus also returned.

He calmed the hurly-burly and advised them around for building up the parcour. Together they worked on it. The first were quick to run through freshly build stations. Sounds of effort and guns shooting echoed through the forest. But Henry noticed how Dexter sat with the animals looking down: "Hey, you seem sad". "Ringo isn't as active as he used to be...", he told glum, "I think he's living his last days...". "I guess the life expectancy of wild animals decreases when you keep them tamed. But I'm quite surprised that you're so filled with consternation", Henry sat down beside him. Dexter tried to describe it: "Is this the feeling that Ilus has towards you and all his gang members? He saved all of you and now you can't let go of each other. I saved Ringo...". "Well possible, but you should rather ask Ilus yourself. I'm still getting to know him myself", Henry pulled his shoulders up. Shortly Dexter was quiet, then he asked: "Was that the feeling you had for Dylan...? You always seemed to protect him...". "You know? You shouldn't be surprised that Ilus hates you when you're always making me remember him", Henry mentioned. "I know that. But he could try to understand that Dylan meant a lot to us. To both of us, no matter what kind of relationship. Just because he's never had friends", Dexter puffed. Henry was stunned: "Such words from your karma-dedicated mouth". "It's the truth...", he muttered.

Both thought it would end in a fight again when they heard Ilus loudly: "Dexter!". But Ilus approached them with a phone in his hands: "I don't know why, but Kiki wants you to return to the hideout with the animals. Can you manage to drive back on your own?". "I don't have a driver's license", he shook his head. "Yeah, but can you drive?", Ilus repeated. "A little bit... Like five miles per hour...", Dexter scratched his back head. Ilus grabbed him by his collar und pulled him to the cars: "We should have a quick printer in Zigz car". "What?! Can't one of your people drive me?! This Lucky's supposed to be a wonderful driver!", Dexter resisted. Henry giggled and thoughtfully looked at the sleeping lemur.

At the camp Dexter fidgeted a lot: "I mean it! Perhaps you want me to die, but you don't want me to crash one of your cars!". Ilus puffed: "Shota! You can drive a car like a decent human, right?". He took his look off of the sweating and training men and nodded: "Yeah, why?". Commanding Ilus pushed Dexter in front of him: "A trip to Seattle, please. And don't make me say Please twice". Shota crossed his arms: "What am I getting for it? Him for one night?". Dexter startled: "What?! No way!". Ilus kept a straight face: "Thousand dollars". "I would be stupid to decline, but I would also be stupid to accept. I know you've got much more", Shota remained stubborn. Rolling his eyes Ilus mumbled: "You really are Koi's brother... Five-thousand". He smiled: "Come with me, Dexi. In Seattle it's much nicer anyway". "Don't forget the animals!", Ilus called after them and went back to the camp with his whistle, "No sleeping! Zigz, get your lazy ass up! It's your turn! Teddy, you're up after Raindrop!". With that Henry stood up and got back to training.

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