𝖿𝖺𝗋 𝖺𝗐𝖺𝗒 - 𝖼.𝗒

♥︎♡ ! >﹏< 𝗖𝗛𝗔𝗣𝗧𝗘𝗥 𝟰𝟰 !

yeonjun is not talking to me.

i was at least expecting him to talk to me after he had showered, to reassure me that whatever happened between elena and him didn't mean anything. but he didn't. when siwoo called us down for dinner, i waited a little while to see if yeonjun would come to walk down with me. but he didn't. at the dinner table, i was at least expecting him to sit near me or at least acknowledge that i was there, even if he just glanced to me. but he didn't.

that was not reassuring in the slightest.

i went on my phone after dinner briefly, but was soon overwhelmed by all of the followers, comments and dms on instagram flooding through so i turned off my notifications. it's all really lovely, but it's scary. suddenly having all of these people looking at your account - it's an invasion of privacy, so i switch my account from public to private. it's weird suddenly having all of this attention. it would be nice to talk to yeonjun about it, as he's receiving the same attention. but he won't even look at me. it's like after hooking up with elena, suddenly i'm invisible. is he thinking about her? is he falling for her?

i have the worst sleep. so much is playing on my mind, so much weighing down on me to think about that finding peace and sleep is so difficult, it takes hours. maybe i fall asleep around three am. my school alarm goes off at six.

getting ready, i barely see him around the house. when i'm ready, i'm sat at the bottom of the stairs with my shoes on, when he eventually comes down. he's dressed in black jeans and a vintage red sweater, which looks really good on him. everything looks really good on him. i look up at him, meanwhile his eyes are cast straight past me.

"ready?" he says, more so to juwon than to me.

juwon nods, while i just stare at him. what's up with him?

in the car, yeonjun doesn't hand me the phone to pick the playlist. he just puts the radio on. i mean...that shouldn't be a big deal but for some reason it is. it's like our little tradition, and now he's acting as though i'm not even in the car. juwon instantly senses the tension, but says nothing.

i stare out of the window, watching buildings and pedestrians flash past as we head around the outskirts of the city. should i say something? no. not with juwon in here. plus, why should i be the one to say something? it should be him talking to me, since he hooked up with elena yesterday. i'm getting annoyed now. what's he playing at? stupid mind games.

turning up to school, i get out, closing the door behind me, leaving him in the car as i walk out with juwon.

"what's happened now?" he asks me quietly.

"nothing, that's the point." i say.

"you haven't spoken?" he asks.

"no." i say.

he pauses, clearly not happy with that response. he turns over his shoulder to look back at his brother. i can hear that he has just closed his car door but i don't bother to look at him.

he's been ignoring me, acting like i'm completely invisible even though he hooked up with another girl, who i happen to strongly dislike, straight after kissing me. i know he didn't ask for that to happen, but he could at least act like he hated it, or show he's keen to make sure i'm okay. but he's being careless. i'm sick of his constant mixed signals and mind games. sick of it.

first lesson on a tuesday is geography. the teacher is super laid back and gets involved in the gossip. everyone loves him. he's the kind of teacher to turn up late, eating breakfast, and asks his students what to do for the lesson.

i sit beside landon, who's laughing with daeun.

"hey." she smiles to me, and he turns his head towards me.