A taste of freedom

Chapter 44

I blinked a few times to re- orientate myself. I felt a pit form in my stomach and the buzzing over took my hearing. "How will you find it?" I questioned and Don spoke. "The call said something about a temple that will tell us how to get there." I chuckled dryly "well good luck then." With that I walked out of the room. 'You can't handle it. That's why they're leaving you.' I shook my head. That's not true, I can handle it just fine. 'Your weak. They don't need you. So they're leaving you behind.' I kept shaking my head and I found myself in the bathroom. "That's not true! Right?" My knees buckled and I fell to the bathroom floor. I felt a weird tingling feeling in the back of my jaw. Shit. I crawled over to the toilet and threw up. Wiping my mouth, I sat against the wall and leaned my head back.

"Im not weak, right?" The tears streaming down my face gave my answer. It made me angry. Why can't I just be stronger? Why can't I be good enough for them? My mind filled with all of these questions and they made me cry even more. I didn't even realize that I'd left the bathroom door open. Ruth came in and froze up when she saw me crying. When was the last time I even talked to her and Luke? I can't remember but I definitely don't want it to be now. "Ruth- just please close the door and leave" I my voice was weak and she looked at me with worry. "Y/n.." I grit my teeth "don't tell anyone and just leave me alone please." I lifted my head to look her in the eyes and saw her concern.

She still stood there so I got up. I glanced in the mirror while wiping my eyes. It didn't even look like I had been crying. Good. I brushed past Ruth slightly when she put her head down. I walked out of the room and too the dining room. Emma had everyone gathered to there and Ruth came in behind me. I assume she was supposed to get me for this. Though, I knew what it was about. Emma opened her mouth to speak but I cut her off by clearing my throat. She turned to look at me. I walked to stand beside her. I didn't know what I was doing but I couldn't just stay here while they did all of the work. "I was contacted by William Minerva." Everyone looked at me and Emma gave one of the most surprised looks. Then all of the kids burst with questions. "Settle down everyone!" I raised my voice a little but not from anger more out of trying to quiet them.

"I'll be leaving tomorrow to go speak with him in his shelter. That's all." I stopped talking and went over to the piano while everyone reminded silent. I reached into the top of the piano and pushed the button. The other secret door opens and I'm about to go in. "Emma, wasn't there something you needed to tell them?" I slid into the weapons room and looked around for a good weapon. I found two small hand guns and figured that they would fit in my holsters. I found the correct bullets for the guns and glanced around the room one more time. Nothing caught my eye so I climbed back up the ladder to find everyone freaking out. I rolled my eyes and walked from the room. I went to my room but soon heard footsteps that I knew to be Ray's and my door opening. I was busy getting my backpack so I didn't turn to him. "Is there something you need Ray?"

When I had grabbed my bag I turned to see he had a slightly annoyed face. "What do you mean your leaving?" I raised an eyebrow. Sure- I had never been contacted by Norman but I still knew how to find him. "I'm not sure I know what you mean Ray." I smiled at him sweetly and that ticked him off more. He walked over to me and grabbed my shoulders a bit harshly. "Y/n just because you're mad at us for making you stay behind doesn't mean you have to go." I huffed "actually Ray, I can do whatever I want. Besides I'll be back before you guys. Also, it's not like your gonna know- you'll be gone to." He sighed and pulled me into a hug. "You're not going" I scowled. "Ray, I can leave after you do and you'd never even know." I pulled back from the hug.

He opened his mouth but I cut him short. "If you're concerned for my safety then don't be. I can kill just about anything without moving more than a hand." He scoffed "I'm worried for your health! Like Gilda said- you need rest! And when was the last time you ate?!" I thought about it for a moment. Didn't I ask myself that same question earlier? I can't remember. "I don't know but that's besides the point. I'm going and there's physically nothing you can do to stop me." I backed away from him a bit and turned around to pack my bag. I took out Lily's sketch book, little bunny and my parasol. I reached into my pocket and grabbed Ray's watch. Tattered as ever but still ticking. Though I didn't know at the time, Ray was frowning at the sight of the object.

I looked in the bag again and found my necklace. I smiled at it and turned back to Ray. "Put it on for me?" I smiled softly at him and he held out his hand. I turned away from him and he brought to necklace to the front on my neck, clipping it into place it the back. He reached around my waist and hugged me from behind. I leaned into the hug. It felt nice. Though, I thought he was mad at me still, it was comforting. "Ray, you love me right?" He hugged me tighter and leaned his head into the crook of my neck, mumbled "more than you know."

Word count: 1045