Carolina [h.s]

thirty five

south carolina
july 1990

***

Vada
//

"She sits beside me like a silhouette hard candy dripping on me 'til my feet are wet—"

Red and white lights flashed through every corner in the building. The beat of the drum pounded through my chest and the strum of the electric guitar chords rang throughout my veins.

Harry's front and center where he belongs and the passion through his eyes shine when he sings his songs with his band. Tall in a loose white button down shirt, he rolls up the baggy sleeves and the middle of his chest shows where his monarch tattoo glows. His smile is high like his mind and when his eyes meet mine in secret I crumble.

Juliet is at my side and we are always determined to be the biggest fans at their shows as we scream the loudest and dance like our bodies are on fire.

Time moves by in a warp and I always have to slow myself down. But as the song ends and another unfamiliar one continues, my mind is in a daze when the leader of it all suddenly reaches his hand down to me.

I am too stunned to do anything at first, and find myself just staring at him as he offers his hand and motions me to come forward. My heart beats through my ears as I look around and the crowd becomes a blur as their cheering becomes muffled.

I turned to Juliet quickly as she stood very still from next to me and her eyes were calculated, looking between trouble's offer and my eyes.

"Vada," Harry's voice calls into the microphone, loud enough for everyone to hear. "Come on, V" his taunting smile haunts me and he's pitching a challenge out of spite.

What the fuck was he doing? My throat felt dry and panic settled into my heartbeat as I felt my whole body freeze.

"Juliet—" I go turn to her again, but her focus isn't on me. It's on her drummer boy as he smiles at her with love. He gives her his attention and his heart and she's been stuck in his daze for the past two years.

So without caring about best friend betrayal I grabbed my summer-secret's hand and let him pull me in his lies and rules without looking back. I let him kiss me in front of everyone and the crowd erupts in a louder cheer.

I'm stuck in his fucked up green eyes and heart warming smile. I lean into the way he holds me like he never wants to let go and melt at the way he looks at me like I'm the only person in the world.

When I pull away from his addictive kiss my heart is beating out of my chest and skyrocketing through my veins. I wonder if this how he felt when he got high. Like he was on top of the world and nothing could stop him.

We stand tall above the cheering crowd and I realize there's a smile on my face despite everything. Despite having this weight of guilt on my shoulders, I felt lighter when I was able to stand with him without hiding.