Red and Black Simon Riley x oc

Part 24: Better

Tw: suicide attempt, Sh, disordered eating, depression, and maybe more but just be aware of very sensitive topics

It's been a week. Simon still hasn't talked to me and I've still been the same since we landed back. Gaz finally forgave me when price told him the full story. Alejandro and Rudy came to see me yesterday. I haven't gotten out of my bed since that shower.

I'm at my lowest point and I don't have anything that's keeping me alive. Simon was my everything. He kept me strong and he was always there. Now he isn't.

I laid in my bed and I heard soft knocks on my door. I saw soap with a plate of food which is what I suspected to be breakfast.

Soap: good morning Lass!

Alia: good morning soap!

Soap: oh are you feeling better?

Alia: yep I feel way better. Let's go eat with everyone else yeah?

Soap: sure!

I got up and walked to the kitchen with soap. He still had my plate and I could tell he was weirded out. I walked in the dining room doors and I saw Price drop his utensils as soon as he saw me.

Price: Alia? Are you better?

Alia: yeah I feel great actually. May I join?

Price: of course! C'mon come sit down.

Alia: alright.

I sat and ate breakfast with everyone. I smiled and laughed. The smiles and laughs may have been slightly fake, but I miss the times they were real. As I slightly mentally parted ways with my team I thought about all of the good times.

I missed the times where my skin wasn't paper and my smiles were real. I missed the late night talks with Simon where I would lay on his chest and listen to his heart beat. I'm gonna miss them.

Alia: hey guys? I'm gonna go catch up on some paperwork in my office.

Soap: alright lass!

Price: glad you joined us doll.

Alia: me too guys!

I walked to my office and went inside. I sat at my desk and started writing on pieces of paper.

After awhile of writing I enveloped the pages and walked to my room. I saw price in the hallway and I stopped to have a small conversation with him.

Price: whatcha doing sweetie?

Alia: I just finished some work so now I'm going to take a well deserved shower.

Price: alright like to hear it!

Alia: I love you... dad.

Price*gasp* I love you too munchkin. I like it when you call me dad. It's very fitting.

Alia: yeah I just wanted to say it cuz y'know you've helped through everything.

Price: awww thanks kid. Now you go get your shower you haven't gotten one in like 3 days so you definitely need one. Love ya kid

Alia: love you too.

I walked to Simon and I's shared bathroom. I locked the door and put the several letters on the bathroom counter. I took all of my clothes off after turning the water to hot. I stared at my freshly cut body and my dry cheeks. I put on a t shirt and shorts and laid in the bath. This is it. The end.

~Simon's POV~

I just got back from the training room. I did some thinking and decided I was going to talk to Alia today. I still love her and Im not mad at her. Im just mad at myself that she threw herself out there to save me. I was never mad at her. I could never be mad at her. I just needed some time to think, but I should've communicated that with her because she hasn't came out of her room all week.

I walked in our shared room and went to my room. I stepped in something wet. My room was right across from the bathroom and the bathroom was leaking water. I heard the bath going so Alia must be in there.

Simon: Alia? There's water coming out of the bathroom. Alia? Alia! Guys! Quick.

I started hitting the door with my shoulder as the rest of the guys ran inside. I busted the door open and saw Alia inside the bath surrounded by bloody water.

Simon: no no no no. C'mon love your ok. C'mon sweetheart. Alia? Oh doll. Price! C'mon wake up. Soap!

Soap: oh god! Oh god! Alia!

Simon: she'll be fine. she'll be ok. Call 911. Call 911! Just call 911! Tell them to hurry!

Price: no no. Alia. Please. Don't do this.

Rudy: she left letters.

Price: oh god!

Simon: Alia wake up please. C'mon baby open your eyes. Someone hand me a cloth so I can stop the bleeding.

I held her limp body in my arms trying to put pressure on her wrists. I was sobbing and trying to calms down. I heard paramedics rush in and go near her. Everything seemed to move in slow mo as the medics rushed her out to the ambulance.

Price and I rode with her in silence to the hospital. I watched the doctors pull her in on a stretcher. Everything was moving so fast yet so slow. For once in my life my guard was down and I felt like I was suffocating.

I ripped my mask off my face and stared at the blood that soaked my grey tshirt. I sobbed and shook as I stared at the blood that was on me. I felt price bring me into a hug and I couldn't move. My body was shaking vigorously and my sobs were loud.

Price was crying as well. His sobs were softer and more controlled. I heard loud footsteps running towards us and I looked to see everyone else. Their eyes were red and puffy. They all were breathing heavily from running.

Soap: whe- where is she?

Price: she's in surgery right now. Let's all sit and calm down.

Alejandro: she seemed fine this morning.

Price: she wanted us to see her happy on her last day.

Rudy: I brought the letters if you guys want to read them.

Price: she wasn't doing paperwork this morning she was writing letters. Oh my god! I should've checked up in her. I should've made sure she was ok. Oh god.

Soap: it's none of our faults. It's not hers either. It's no one's fault. None of us could have prevented this.