Chapter 39: You're Disgusting

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Lo'ak doesn't care if his dad gets mad at him, when he hears the cries of not only his sister by Esmyrie too, he runs in.

Kiri is crying by her mother and Jake is trying to soothe Esmyrie, where Norm and Max still stand, confusion on their faces.

He wants to question the scientists for answers but right now Esmyrie needs him.

"Esmyrie... You're okay. Dad what happened?" Lo'ak asks rapidly, taking the girl away from Jake's embrace to try and calm her.

When Neteyam enters and Esmyries eyes land on him, she begins to be more panicked, grabbing at her hair and pulling tightly.

"Esmyrie?" Neteyam whispers, not knowing how to react.

All Esmyrie can see looking at him is blood. Blood on his chest, blood leaking from the wound. So much blood and then his death.

She stands up abruptly, suddenly needing to get far away from the eyes of worry the scientists are giving her, and the boy who she sees dead.

"Esmyrie hang on, maybe don't stand up so quic-" Norm suggests but she sends him a glare, pushing Lo'ak away when he tries to force her to sit back down.

"Esmy, please sit." Lo'ak pleads, but Esmyrie doesn't listen, pushing the boy away and nudging Neteyam when she exits the hut.

She can't be in there right now. Not when they are all looking at her like she is insane. Not when she knows the glances they are giving her are out of pity.

So, she runs. Running past the village, avoiding anyone that tries to talk to her, even Ao'nung who tries to speak to her. She just ignores him and continues to run.

She needs to get away. She needs to get away and forget.

When she stops running she finds herself by a cove, a beach there that seems unoccupied. She decides here is a good place to rest. It's away from prying eyes, away from the village, and away from scientists who will want to probably experiment on her to find out what is wrong.

It seems that being alone though only makes her thoughts be louder, so much so it's almost suffocating.

She just wanted to see her father. She wanted a hug from him. He always made everything okay. But he is gone, and she can't even see him with Eywa. Instead she is gifted these terrible images that make her feel like her head is exploding.

It's all becoming too much.

And so, she jumps into the water.

She felt at peace with the water the last time she was there. Riding the Ilu made her feel at peace. The sea made her feel home. More connected to her mother.

So maybe the sea can make her feel at peace again, even if just for a little while.

She accepts the oceans hug with grace, allowing the coldness to hold her like a blanket.

She is right. It is peaceful here.

She smiles when she sees a Ilu and it's baby swim up to her, nudging at her hand to pet it. She does so, smiling when the animal makes a sound of thanks.

She laughs when glowing fish come up to her, swimming in circles around her, their scales changing colors.

When she is in the sea she doesn't feel alone with her thoughts, she feels connected, like the animals understand her pain and try to help.

The entire time she is in the sea her thoughts don't drift to her visions, instead she is focused on riding the Ilu perfectly or helping the fish that got stuck in coral. She even thinks she see's one of the fishes fins twitch, as if it was waving at her.

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