𝘲𝘶𝘢𝘤𝘬𝘪𝘵𝘺 𝘰𝘯𝘦 𝘴𝘩𝘰𝘵𝘴

𝙤𝙣𝙚 𝙡𝙖𝙨𝙩 𝙙𝙖𝙮

written by duraznosycrema00 on tumblr 

"So, how do you feel, (Y/N)?" The therapist asked, sitting directly across from me. I looked up to his slender face and almost smacked the glasses right off of him. I've lost the love of my life and he's asking me how I am? I'm so empty, nothing makes sense anymore. Numbers don't add up, words don't sound the same. The air even feels different, heavier. How do I tell him that?

"Normal," I mumbled, looking back down at my hands. My eyes traveled to my wrist, where a bracelet was loosely wrapped around it. 'Mi amor' was engraved on the charm hanging from the string. A pang hit my heart and my throat got tight.

The man in front of me let out a 'hm' as he watched my actions, "I see you still wear what Alex gave you." My eyes shot up to his face again as he mentioned his name.

"What else am I supposed to do?" I meant for my tone to sound harsh, but it came out as hopeless and empty. A small sigh left my lips as I looked back down at the bracelet. I allowed my fingers to fumble with the charm. The pit in my stomach started to grow. The rocks in my chest seemed to grow in size. Everything was so heavy. The silence of the room was so loud. Even the air conditioner had cut off.

He copied my sigh, then put his clipboard down. "(Y/N), if you could relive his last day, would you?"

My heart dropped to my stomach. Once again, my gaze shot up to him, searching his face for any signs of anything. Maybe searching where he got the audacity to ask me that question. I felt my breathing quicken as my heart started to race. I opened my lips to speak, then closed them, then opened them again.

"Of course I would. I would do anything just to see him again, just to feel him again. Everything feels so different. Even right at this moment, I know his hand would be on mine. I want to feel that again. I miss everything about him. I even miss his dishes in the sink," The words poured out. My mouth quickly shut again as I averted my gaze.

I heard the doctor's clothes shuffle as he stood up. Once he came back, he gave me a glass of water.

"Drink this, it has a vitamin in it. We need to monitor your sleep patterns," He spoke in a professional tone, as if I didn't just speak the most words I had in months. I looked up at the glass of water. It was clear. I grabbed it and drank it.

"Good. Now lay down. I'll be back in a moment." And then he left the room.

I watched the door shut and heard it click. My head became empty as I layed back on the couch I was sitting on. Eventually, my eyes shut.

"(Y/N), mi amor, you have to wake up," His voice rang in my ears, causing my heart to race. My eyes shot open and were met with his. A smile appeared on his face before he leaned down to kiss my forehead. A lump in my throat and a pit in my stomach formed. I smelled his scent, I felt his warm lips on my skin. It was all too real.

"Alex?" I croaked out, sleep still evident in my voice.

"Good morning, sleepyhead. We have to run some errands today so hurry up and get dressed. I already got you some coffee." He smiled at me. Another kiss was left on my cheek before he left the room.

I sat up and looked around. The winter season I was previously in was now gone and replaced with summer sun leaking through the windows. The empty, barren room I had grown used to was now lively and had clothes strung about the floor. I looked over to the night stand, where my phone sat, and checked the time and date. 9:14 AM, June 26, 20XX. I felt my dinner start to rise from my stomach, searching for an escape.

"(Y/N)? Are you alright?" Alex's voice called out as I emptied my stomach in the toilet. I groaned in response. The door opened, revealing Alex's worried face.