Too Late

41

CRUZ POV

The Disinfectant was strong.

The lights were dimmed.

The room was peaceful when the door shuts out the voices calling out codes or instruction.

The room was moderately cold setting a gloomy atmosphere.

My arms ached not wanting to put precious down her tiny eyes remind me of a rare gem that is exquisite and pure her little nose dusted with pink her little lips move I hold my breath her ma Terry has been in the theatre for God only knows from a lost of alot of blood the doctors believe I'm precious father.

The nurses has been overwhelming me with how to hold precious correctly, supporting her head, feeding, burping, changing her I still don't like that looking at her makes me feel wrong, I feel I'm the wrong person to hold a pure gift from the heavens.

Over time the nurses generosity of kindness and understanding helped ease some what of my raging heart I want to call Marcia every minute I think what would she do right now if she was here she would know exactly what to do and how to demand everyone's attention including mine.

D had called ten minutes ago I had to whisper to not wake precious up but I did and she has yet to go back to sleep a knock is heard and the door opens in walks a nurse with D behind her holding flowers and a pink teddy bear.

"thank you Cassandra"

My brothers voice just louder then a whisper the nurse blush and left us to be.

He places the flowers on the table and teddy bear in precious plastic bassinet and sits next to me her eyes shift to him he leans closer she squirms in her pink blanket.

"I don't think she likes sharing you brother" he whispers with a slight amused tone.

I chuckle slightly not to make her cry.

"she's definitely cute those ocean mist eyes are mesmerising"

I could only nod staring at her looking at D.

"I don't know what to do D I can't leave her here alone none of terry's family has come to visit and the worse thing is people come and go there's no security for her safety if I leave"

D leans back into the couch and I do too feeling my back will ache tomorrow.

"brother she's not your responsibility you have done as much as you can what more can you do?"

I sigh not taking my eyes away from hers.

"I don't want to leave her here alone I need to find terry's family there has to be someone that can help"

"What if terry's family ain't supportive as you may hope brother what then?"

I think and it hurts to even think terry will struggle to survive motherhood all alone.

"I need to find the papa"

"what if he doesn't even know or want the baby or be in terry's life?"

Her eyes drift slowly to sleep her eyes move under her eyelids her hands move to get comfortable I slowly get up and place her in her bassinet and stretch my back with a few bones crack into place.

I sat next to D rubbing my face frustration sets in.

" I just can't leave not knowing the baby will be okay D I can't have that on my conscious her future is in my hands the doctors and nurse think I'm her papa and I will hate myself if something god forbid something bad happens to her under my care"