It was only 11pm and we was still up. Notti went downstairs to get snacks and make tacos so me and dd was upstairs waiting.
Dd lift my chin and started kissing me slowly and i wanted it to last forever. "ma" dd mumbles so i hum in response.
"do you still self harm or suicide'l , be honest with me" dd asked so i shrug my shoulders and play with my hands getting nervous. He kept his eyes on me waiting for a proper answer.
"ight.........ion know man" i say looking down with my eyes watering. He moved my hair out my face and seen my eyes tearing up so he hugged me and pulled my head into his arms. I heard Notti walk up the stairs so i wiped my tears quickly and sat up.
"wait... you good, you look like you been cryin" Notti says eating tacos and passing me and dd a tacos too. I shake my head to his question so he sits down and we eat as we watched a scary movie.
I look up seeing Notti asleep on the end of my bed and dd still awake watching tv. "ma" dd mumbles so i look at him and nod. "i love you, like alot" he says so i chuckle. "i love you too, like alot" i say copying him so he laughed.
"nah but im being dead serious" he says pulling my arm forcing me to lay on his chest. "im being dead serious too dd" i say looking him dead in the eye so he started smiling with his teeth showing and his dimples.
"ma thank you" dd says pulling me closer to him. "for what" i mumble as my eyes closed slowly. "everything" he says so i blush as my eyes open and meet with his.
"you make me feel different" dd says so i pull him closer and closer to me and kiss him slowly so he started smiling. "me casare contigo algun dia" dd says meaning 'im gonna marry you one day'
"donde se va a ambientar la boda" i say meaning : wheres the wedding gonna be set.
"en algun lugar con caballos" he says meaning : somewere with horses.
"awww i used to own a horse" i say as he smiled at the fact i used to be a horse girl.
"so you was a barn girl?" dd asked so i made a pffft sounds. "fuck outta here, i dont like other horses but i had this one horse named Lay she was a wild horse, i loved that horse but im dead smoking on lay lay" i say making him laugh.
I close my eyes and i felt dd's lips connect to mine. He kissed me for a while before stopping and we both smiled and layed in silence. "you still haven't answered my question from earlier" dd says so i realize hes talking about the self harm and suicide question.
"i don't self harm no more" i say so he nods his head. "what about the other one" he says so i think about it and i still want to die because of my dad and everyone but i shrug my shoulders.
"yes or no olivia" he says. "sometimes but stuff like you make me wanna change my mind" i say as he nods. "don't do it please, i need you" dd says as tears leave his eyes. My heart instantly melted and i felt like crying too. I sat up and held his head as he talked to me.
"if you go im going to because im not living with the fact i fell inlove with someone and then they killed there self " dd says so i tilt my head and look at him as he cried a little but quietly so he didn't wake up notti. I let him lay on my chest and talk to me about everything and seeing his point of view on everything made me re think everything.
"if you kill yourself ill live with that for ever knowing that i could have stopped you from trying and i-i dont think i would ever f-forgive myself" dd says crying so i look down at him and shred a few tears too. I listen to him speak about everything and him opening up to me made my heart melt . he is so adorable.
" thats why i didn't want to leave you alone today, i don't want you to do anything stupid like overdose because if you go i go we ride or die bitch" he says so i chuckle and close my eyes.
"goodnight my love" dd says so i look down at him and give him a peck and mumble "goodnight" on his lips making him get the shivers.
We fell asleep and it felt so good to get everything of our chests.
It felt like a weight was being lifted of my shoulder.....
