adoration: part two

seven

April 3rd Toronto, ON

"Melody!!!!! We love you!!!!"

"MISS VERSTAPPEN WE SEE YOU!"

"Melody your music saved me!"

"Melody when's the new album!!!"

"QUEEN MEL!"

"Thank you Toronto, I've received so much love here and I'm so grateful. Thank you my loves." I thanked them as I finished up my ninth performance.

Looking back I've never given singers enough credit, don't get me wrong when it comes to the whole debate about payments I absolutely think doctors and medical professionals should be paid x10000000 more than we are.

But, the travelling and the hectic schedules were really health impacting, there was never really a break from the world.

As I got off the stage Elliot was immediately praising me "Melody you have insane talent my girl. Insane talent."

I nodded along joyfully, I could do it again easily, after shows now I was just a ball of craziness, like I could run a thousand metre track twelve times.

Once I reached my dressing room I had an incoming call from Kelly "Hello mel, has your concert just ended?"

"Yep! It was great! I really enjoyed it! Toronto is so beautiful, hey maybe you and Max should come and have a honeymoon here." I told her excitedly, my hands shaking with adrenaline.

"Uh maybe, are you drunk?" She giggled down the phone which made me laugh in return.

"No silly, what's going on what's happening?" I asked her rambling slightly, I needed to calm it down.

"We need to find you a dress, I wanted to ask if you wanted to do the same as the bridesmaids or different as a maid of honour?" She wondered into the phone.

In December I was given the honour of being Kelly's maid of honour at the wedding and my heart practically burst, it was the best non Christmas present I'd ever had.

"I mean it's up to you, your wedding, me and p could totally match or do different. I'm far too indecisive for that." I explained which she accepted as she tapped away on her laptop.

Since I was constantly away we had to look at dresses online rather than in store, which was difficult. Weddings had to be perfect and dressing accordingly was pretty Damn hard.

A maid of honours role is to make the brides life easier and honestly I was doing the total opposite, "Okay well the theme is white, pink and grey."

I nodded along "Pen looks really cute in light pink." I told her as I thought about my soon to be actual niece in a pink dress.

Let's be real I'm going to cry more than anyone else.

"Yeah I think I might have the bridesmaids in like a blush sort of colour, unsure about your colour but are you happy for me to pick you a dress?" She asked.

"Oh yeah that's great, I will send you the money for it when I'm back in LA." I told her as I soon hung up, my hands still shaking like crazy.

I already knew I was going to get absolutely zero sleep tonight, my mind is going one hundred miles an hour constantly. I had so many thoughts about random crap that I was really struggling to go to sleep.

I had a tour bus which was really nice, it was large enough for me to live comfortably in it and honestly I barely stayed in it but for some reason sleep was never good in that bed.

I'd tried everything over the past month, lavender essential oils, eye masks, melatonin gummies, breathing methods. It wasn't happening, which was absolutely wild considering the amount I had been working.

Each performance has different choreography, which was annoying for me but the fans absolutely ate it up. My team pride themselves on being different and unique in each state.

+33 4562 2638
My family are going absolutely feral over these tickets, thank you so so much Mel.

Melody 🎶
Charles?

Charles
Oh yeah it's me

Melody 🎶
How'd you get my number?

Charles
I remembered it

Melody 🎶
Oh

Charles
Anyway, thank you

Melody 🎶
Don't thank me honestly, if I had more tickets they'd be heading their way.

Charles
I didn't realise they were VIP, Arthur was literally jumping for joy. Don't think he'd admit it though.

Melody 🎶
haha, he's so funny. I'm glad he likes them x

Charles
When are you in Monaco?

Melody 🎶
April 8th

Charles
Will you let me take you to dinner?..

Melody 🎶
🤷‍♀️🤷‍♀️🤷‍♀️

Charles
Please Mel

Melody 🎶
okay, if i get to pay for food.

Charles
we all know that isn't happening melody. now sleep it's late in toronto

Melody 🎶
how'd you know I was in Toronto?

Charles
im a fan mel

melody 🎶
don't think your girlfriend would like that very much.

Charles
Charlotte was hardly my girlfriend, and we aren't together anymore Mel.

Melody 🎶
🙈

Charles
Just sleep.

I ended the conversation there, well I suppose he did.

My situation with Charles was so complex in my head but it wasn't in real life, we were together and he cheated and every time I find myself thinking about him I have to tell myself.

he's done it once he can do it again.

once a cheater always a cheater

But it was never enough, everything I did somehow brought me back to Charles and it was the most annoying thing in the universe.

because I still love him with all of my heart.

but I can't hurt myself again, it's inevitable.

It was a constant battle between head and heart, and these days the heart was winning, as soon as I saved his contact I knew it.

melody, you're weak.

And much like every night of no sleep, my thoughts were centred around him.