Bittersweet Heart (Ominis Gaunt x James Sharp)

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"...

The time will pass quickly, you won't notice. It is bearable here, you should not worry.

Has your hair grown long? Has your skin burned with gold? I felt it in my dream.

Once you are trapped here, you cannot leave. I wish I could catch the summer scent on you before the autumn takes it.

..." 

He reread the letter and hid it in the drawer among other envelopes. Each was accurate, with cursive letters and a silky ribbon on.

James sat by the light of the lantern. His shadow warped on the walls. Every new letter from him was ghastlier than one before. Ominis' presence felt weaker as if the manor was a living creature, feeding on his despond.

He took small scissors and cut one of his strands. Then tied it with a ribbon and wrote a short note: "The summer won't end until I see you."

The studio was the only messy room in the house. James' mother used to work here at her developments. The last thing she was working on was a fertilizer device. The drawings were still somewhere here.

Now this room was used for potion brewing and also by Aura, the eared striped owl of the Sharps. Her right ear was constantly bent down and her eyes squinted as if she has just woken up. Actually, she didn't look as sharp as her family.

James tickled her feathers and she pecked him affectionately.

"I have a letter for you. Please leave it by the window as always."

***

Dinner at ten in the evening, when lights in the neighbours' living rooms were already off and they might be reading bedtime books.

His mother was brushing her hair in the light of the chandelier. The portrait hung so that one could see her from the dining table only with the corner of their eye.

Cutlery clinked on dishes. James paused, moving the plate away.

"Father, I have to talk to you."

Aesop raised his eyes to James. A gesture that he listens.

"I didn't ask you much, but now I have a plea", James commanded his heart to stop racing. He shouldn't show his worry. "This will be my last year at Hogwarts. And I'm planning to move out after graduation soon enough. But now I need to take Ominis here. He doesn't have another home."

"I thought he has more of that than anyone else."

James should stay polite.

"It is not safe there for someone like him. You should know perfectly what his family is."

"Yes. And you might remember that I respected your choice of friends. Until both of them went too far."

"You know nothing about this. First, that was not Ominis' fault. Last, the problem is solved."

"The 'problem' couldn't be solved, James. Because the 'problem' is essential for these people. Some dark material couldn't disappear without a trace. It will eventually influence you. And I don't want this fate for you."

James felt fury boiling in his body.

"Now I hear something that you really understand. So tell me, what should I do? Shall I sacrifice all beloved for not being someday swallowed by their past? Isn't this what you've done? 'Influenced'?"

Aesop was steadfast as an ice sculpture.

"That is why I'm telling you this."

James jumped up from his chair. His hands were shaking from anger. He looked at his father and suddenly felt only disgust. He continued, looking directly into his eyes:

"Your advice for me is to leave things as they are. Meaning you want me to continue this pathetic life of yours. It will be even better if I became a little man like you, failed to save his loved one, scared of his own inside and fighting the guilt and loneliness to the end of his life." He turned around, looking at their house. "You want me to live this life? I will leave this pleasure to you. I am done."

"And what will you do?", Aesop was completely calm.

"That is none of your concern. If you like to help me, you know what I want. If not, I shall leave soon."

***

He had a backup plan. But it wasn't very realistic. He has a personal bank account with a deposit he should receive at his seventeen but he'll reach this age only in two months.

There was also some saved money. He saw some abandoned houses near Hogsmeade. But if his conclusions were correct, even with tons of the Conjuration Spells he still will need more money to be able to live there. And you can't just settle in some house.

James dropped his head into his hands, looking at hair hanging down. It became so long, again.

The knock at the door and the silence.

Aesop walked into the room without an answer. He landed beside James on his bed.

James wasn't bothered to look at him.

"Sometimes I forget how similar you are to her", Aesop's voice had bitter notes.

"I don't know what you are expecting me to say."

"She was stubborn just like you. I loved her as I will always love. But one who has the power of knowledge should carry the responsibility for it. She wasn't listening to the facts of who I am or what kind of life will be waiting for us if ever we end up together. And eventually, it caught her up."

James covered his eyes with his palms, pressing on them.

"You've forgotten I am not the same as you. And even if this is a mistake, I will do it. You can't say anything to stop me. The only choice you have now is to lose me or not." James wasn't sure in his last words, but he will pull all levers.

He felt a hand landing at the back of his head. His shoulders twitched at the unexpected gesture.

"I want to believe you are wiser than me. Then when do you want him to come?"