All For Fun | Jenna Ortega Imagines

Pills n Potions (j.o)

Your feet scraped the carpet, collecting debris as you trekked the theater aisle. Your movement collected the attention of the audience at your left and right; it even earned whispers. A piece of paper in your hand, the wind of your walk making a flag out it.

Your eyes were fixed on the patterns of the floor as you neared the stairs to get on stage. You treaded the steps, going to the microphone at the center. Creaking wood echoed the unvarying silence of the auditorium as you moved.

You kept your eyes fixed to the floor, standing before the mic. You bit the corner of your lip, it trembling as you did so. You straightened out the paper in your hand, lining it up to read while swallowing your salivated nerves.

Your eyes skimmed the paper, and an unsteady breath escaped your lips. The action earning you a screech from the microphone, startling you a bit. Your breathing picked up, chest rising as you stood clenching the paper. Your nails poking a hole into it the tighter your grip became.

"I —," you started and ended, just as fast, your breathing was hollow, so your voice cracked. Suddenly, you balled the paper up, tossing it over your shoulder. The bouncing of the paper ball providing much needed sound in the dead silent theater.

Finally, you peered into the sea of people; allowing yourself to explore the gaze of the onlookers. Nervously, but hastily, you rolled down your sleeves to the point of covering your hands. Your feet shuffled closer while you shivered at the cold expressions in the room.

You closed your eyes. You shook where you stood, picking at the helm of your shirt.

You exhaled, softly, and opened your eyes. You nodded, centering yourself as your body became still with something you didn't deserve: comfort.

"I still loved.

I know so many of you don't believe me,

I know she didn't.

Not after the first time,
Not after the second time,
Not after the last time,

I know she didn't.

But I still loved.

No matter how many times she asked me
"Why'd you do it?"
Her eyes would water,
with a squint of disbelief
That the girl she loved would ever cheat,
ever allow someone else to use her favorite face as a seat,
Her favorite place to eat,
To meet,
and run my hands along someone else's body.

Pelvic to pelvic,
meat to meat,
I know how she felt about it

Disbelief—

that the girl she loved would ever be dishonest,
ever be this honest,
When she was no longer listening,
Eyes no longer glistening,
pain of my actions,

Grief—
Forcing her back into christening,
conditioning
her value to zero,
God became her hero

Because of my sin.

But I still loved.

No matter how many times I broke her trust,
Promised, "I'd never do it again"
Swore from Mount Everest,
That that girl was just my friend,
Knowing damn well that when this argument ends,
I'll see her again.

Until I'm caught,
back where the story begins

"Jenna, she's just my friend."