Monasterio Series 8: Nights in Casa Vallejo

Chapter 58

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Chapter 58

Gusto kong isipin na sa sobrang pangungulila ko sa kaniya, hindi totoong nakikita ko siya sa mga sandaling ito. Maybe my mind was just playing tricks on me.

Ganoon naman talaga, hindi ba? Sometimes, when you are missing a certain person, your mind will try to create a scene where you would be able to experience what you have been longing to happen.

Matagal ko nang gusto makita si Terrence. Matagal ko na siyang gusto makasama. Balikan. Pero masiyadong maraming bagay ang pumipigil sa akin noon lalo pa at iniisip kong sila ni Shannen. O, kung hindi man sila, may iba siyang nakatuluyan.

But seeing him walking closer to me, I realized... that this isn't just imagination. That my mind isn't creating scenes that aren't true.

Sunod-sunod ang pagbagsak ng luha sa mga pisngi ko. I can feel my lips trembling... my chest having a hard time breathing out...

This is real.

He sighed while staring intently at me. His eyes were darker I could get lost in them that I won't probably find my way out.

"Your tears are starting to freak me out," his voice was raspy. "Please tell me I shouldn't be worried about that."

Natawa ako. "You know what I realized when I met you? I became a cry baby."

The corner of his lips curled up. Dinala niya ang kamay sa pisngi ko at marahang pinalis ang luha mula doon. Just the feeling of his hand slowly stroking against my skin turned me more emotional.

"Ako lang ang lalaking iniyakan mo..."

"I know. Don't you think that's something you should be proud of?" I made sure arrogance was on my voice.

He chuckled. "I am. You should be proud of yourself, too..." he said while continue stroking my cheek with his thumb. "Ikaw lang rin ang... babaeng iniyakan ko."

I've seen it a lot of times but I don't think it should be something to be proud of. Kung sa ganoong dahilan ko lang rin siya makikiyang umiiyak ng dahil sa akin, hindi na bali.

"Is a year already enough for you to be healed?" he asked.

"Are you asking about physically? Because if you are..." I smiled. "I'm cancer free."

He's trying to hide the smile on his lips but didn't succeed. It still came out naturally. Maging ang mga mata niya ay hindi rin maitago ang tuwa.

"I always know that you can make it..." he said while drilling his set of dim eyes on mine. Dinala niya ang kamay sa ibabaw ng puso ko dahilan para maramdaman ko ang pagbigat ng aking dibdib. "How about this one?"

Natawa ako kasabay ng pagkalaglag ng panibagong luha mula sa mga mata ko.

"I should be the one asking you that. Within the year of living away from me, have you finally cleared your mind?"

He sighed and licked his lower lip. Mariin niya akong tinitigan at kagaya ng tapang na mayroon ako noon, sinuklian ko ang pagtitig niya.

"I won't say that it was a waste of time because I already know who and what I want on the very first day you left me..." he said, his expression became ever more serious. "But I know you needed it. You needed to heal on your own. A time without me. And I'm sorry if I gave you confusion and insecurities. While I was trying to show you how much I am in love with you, I was also hurting you."