The love we share

Chapter 39

Soojins POV 

I feel dread as I watch Jennies car leave, somethings off and we both know it. I just hope she can wait. 

"That wasn't your manager" my mum ask as we start to set the table. 

"No it wasn't" I reply flatly. 

"Who was it?" I sigh and stand to look at her. 

"Jennies manager" she pauses what she's doing. 

"You still hangout with her?" her voice surprising soft. 

"Yeah, only recently though" I reply quietly suddenly nervous for the interrogation.  

"I'm glad, she was always a good influence." I look up finally making eye contact and she's smiling softly at me. 

"And she makes you happy" I stay silent and continue setting up the table, she laughs lightly after I accidentally knock over the cups flustered by what she's said. 

"I went to the dorm the other day looking for you, Miyeon told me that you haven't been at home for a while" I look up in shock and she has a teasing smirk on her face. 

"W-what" 

"Soojin, it's okay you're an adult now and I need to apologise to you" she sighs suddenly shifting the mood, she sits down and motions me to do the same. 

"I haven't always been the most supportive parent, the last time we talked really made me realise how much I've hurt you. I know honey and I'm okay with it I always have been but I was so afraid of what would happen to you if people found out so I acted the way I did and i'm sorry." she says with tears in her eyes and my own are forming. 

"It's no excuse for how I've made you feel  but I want to be open with you and tell you that no matter who you love I will always support and love you." 

"Mum" I say breathless moving to hug her, she hugs me just as tight. I feel an overwhelming rush of relief and happiness. I didn't even realise how much I needed her support until this moment. We're both crying but I know from happiness and forgiveness. We pull away smiling brightly. 

"Now we can finally talk about your love life!" she says excitedly. I giggle by her reaction. 

"Well it's a mess at the moment that's for sure." She nods her head in understanding. 

"Uh let me guess Jennie and Shuhua?" I nod my head sadly. 

"Do you love them?" she says softly. 

"Yes" I say quietly. 

"Do you love them in the same way" I shake my head no unable to say the words. 

"Then you know what you have to do" she says rubbing my cheek. 

"But I'm going to hurt her" I say with more tears. 

"Maybe, but honey we only live one life and we're lucky if we even get to love. So when you have it don't let it go" I hug her tightly and cry into her neck. I know what I have to do and I think I've always known. 

"Thank you mum" I truthfully say. 

"No need to thank me my baby, now come lets eat" 

...................................

After resting at my parents house I've made my way to the dorms, waiting outside the door nervously. I take a deep breath and go inside, I know Shuhuas here and I've asked Miyeon if she can go out for a bit so I know its just me and her.