Major trigger warning //// suicide attempt /// overdose
The bath was nice it was the perfect temperature
Carlos had put that bath salt that they both liked in which relived Tk's tense muscles the second his body sinked into the water
They always sat the same way Carlos sat against the tub and Tk sat in between his legs so he could be close to his chest something that Tk loved ever since the beginning of there relationship
Carlos did have an amazing chest but the biggest reason Tk loved it was because he could lay his head on his chest and hear every heart beat
Baths were something special they did they only did it when one needed comforting or if they were stressed
Tk didn't want to talk about it - not not not so soon it didn't even feel real his father had died yesterday
His father was dead
The only thing keeping him grounded was Carlos's heart beat the small strokes the he made up and down his back "you wanna talk about it .." Carlos asked placing small little kisses into Tk's hair
"If I say no will you be mad ?" Tk asked "no it just
Makes you human .." Carlos said softly "I'm sorry about all of this ." Tk said softly looking up at Carlos
Carlos hated when Tk apologized Tk always felt like everything was his fault and Carlos knew that
And he couldn't stand the thought of knowing that Tk's brain was racing thinking everything was his fault "don't ever apologize again okay ?" Carlos said "none of this - you hear me ?" Carlos said making sure Tk was paying attention "none of this is your fault ." Carlos said softly
Tk turned around in the tub so he was straddling Carlos as he kissed him his hands slid up and down the back of Carlos's neck "Tk - baby no ." Carlos said as Tk pulled back
"I'm sorry -" Tk said panicking " Ty it's not that I don't want to your vulnerable and I don't want to take advantage of that -" Carlos said " no it's fine I don't know - I don't know what got into me I think I'm just gonna go to bed .." Tk said wrapping a towel around himself Tk came over and kissed the top of Carlos's head "love you." Tk said before exiting the bathroom
Bye the time Carlos got out and dried off Tk was already in bed curled around the blankets Carlos got in in attempt to not disturb Tk's rest Tk wasn't asleep though he was awake -
He didn't want To feel this way
And he hated that he did feel this way Tk starred at the ceiling all night until the sun came up he didn't care that he had a shift he placed a kiss on Carlos's and maya's head before he left buttercup greeting him at the door "take care of them buddy ." Tk said as buttercup licked his face
Tk leaned on the bridge taking in the air the bridge was old and abandoned Tk knew what he was doing his pulse was racing "fuck." Tk cursed Tk frantically opened his bottle of anxiety meds taking them one then 2 till he was done the whole bottle he leaned on the railing to the bridge he felt weak lightheaded he knew he was going to die he needed his pain to stop
His phone rang it was Carlos he declined his phone rang again Carlos declined his phone rang again Carlos but this time he answered
"Tk were are you ?" Carlos asked frantically but only hard shallow breathing in the response "Tk I need you to answer me please .." Carlos said "the bridge.." Tk mumbled "the abandoned one .." Tk breathed out the medicine was kicking in it was to late "Tk I'm on my way did you take anything I need to know ." Carlos mumbled "just some pills.." Tk whispered "Tk I need you to stay on the phone ." Carlos said through his tears "Tk I'm almost there just stay awake .." Carlos said
When Tk woke up there was a bright light which he knew meant he was in the hospital as he became more coherent he saw Carlos in the corner "mm sorry .." Tk said looking at Carlos "I'm really sorry Carlos .." Tk said as tears filled his eyes "shh" Carlos said softly stroking Tk's cheek "I'm just glad your safe .." Carlos said softly "I'm so sorry I just wanted the pain - I wanted it to stop ." Tk cried "I didn't mean to scare you like that ." Tk cried as Carlos wiped the tears that fell "were gonna go home tonight together okay baby ?" Carlos said softly " and your gonna take some time off or work okay ?" Carlos asked Tk nodded softly "were gonna have some family time and your gonna take time time you need go back to therapy and go to meetings .." Carlos said
On the ride home Tk slept the medicine the hospital gave him made him tired he was curled up in the backseat with a plaid blanket wrapped around him Carlos constantly kept checking on him through the rear view window when the got home Carlos woke Tk up maya was with Lucy Carlos wanted Tk not to have to worry about maya finding out tonight they needed to talk they both got in bed when Tk looked over at Carlos "I'm sorry .." Tk whispered tears forming in his eyes Tk couldn't hold it in anymore "I'm really sorry Carlos I didn't mean to scare you like that -." Tk cried as Carlos hugged him "I wanted I to stop I needed it all to stop ." Tk cried into Carlos's neck "its okay shhh baby .." Carlos said pulling Tk into his lap "I'm so sorry ." Tk cried "I know baby .." Carlos said
"We are gonna figure it out together baby ." Carlos said "were gonna get you help ." Carlos said "I don't wanna loose you or maya .." Tk cried "were right her baby .. were not going anywhere .." Carlos stroked Tk's cheek "I'm right here ." Carlos said kissing his head
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