Every Tick of Serendipity ( Ruler of Fate Series #3 )

KABANATA 45

Kabanata 45

The forty-fifth tick

They looked away... Kuya Zyler and Xavier... Both of them looked away from me.

And that... That was enough for me to feel shattered. It's like a scene where I was falling inside an abandoned tower. Where only nothing but the rusty metals, creaked walls, and darkness are all I can see as I fall and fall without having a voice to use.

I chuckled and shook my head. "No... Y-You... You wouldn't know, right?" Kusang umataras ang paa ko dahil sa panghihina. "Y-You shouldn't—"

"Amber—"

"H-How could the two of you know..." My eyes blinked repeatedly, letting all the tears fall so that I could see them clearly.

They have soft gazes on their eyes, while I have mine, piercing straight at them. They were looking at me in awe and full of regret, while I guarded my own heart from those things. I was trying my best not to look away so that I wouldn't have to forgive them easily. One hold of my hand, one hug around my body, and one kiss on the top of my head — I know I'll lose it immediately. And I don't need someone's touch, especially right now, because I'll surely melt and be weak just because of that.

Kuya Xavier let out a sigh, stood up straight, and put both of his hands inside his pockets. "Nyxene—"

"Don't..." My forehead creased at him after I rubbed the tears from my eyes. "Don't call my name. I-I just need answers..."

I immediately took a step backward when Kuya Zyler tried reaching me. His hand, which was supposed to grab my pulse, stopped in midair, completely frozen as he looked at me with his slightly parted lips.

I looked at them alternately, with anger in my eyes. "Y-You watch me cry... Y-You watch—"

Kuya Zyler stood up. "T-Teka lang, Nyx—" He stopped when I glared at him even more.

"Especially you, Kuya." My lips quivered, but I managed to throw those words at him.

He was there a lot... Even more than I was with Kuya Xavier. Yet he didn't say anything — not a single clue, heads-up, or word of honesty.

Fucking unfair... They were fucking unfair.

I looked up and wiped another batch of tears as I gulped down all the lump in my throat, the heaviness in my mind, and the pain inside. "Y-You watch how I-I..." I groaned when no matter what I did, every liquid kept coming and coming. Hindi ko magawang makapagsalita dahil paulit-ulit ang pagsinok at ang pag-iyak ko. It was making me frustrated and even more mad.

"I'm sorry—" I flinched when I felt my elbow being touched by Kuya Zy.

My feet again took a step away. Hindi ko na namalayan ang ginawa kong pagtampal sa kamay niya dahil kusang gumalaw ang katawan ko. "How could you?!" My mind, heart, and I shouted.

Anything inside me was screaming with so much betrayal.

His lips parted. "L-Let us explain..."

I shook my head and pointed at myself with my trembling hands. "Y-You watch how I hope for him to come back, Kuya. The both of you!"

"Wala naman kaming magaga—"

"But still, I am your sister!" Sinabutan ko ang buhok ko at malakas siyang tinulak. "Every day for all these years! God! Nagmukha akong stupid — crying and cursing him even though the both of you are there! I-I—" Nagpakawala ako nang malakas na buntong hininga at paulit-ulit na hinampas ang dibdib ko dahil sa sakit.