Follow Carmen, a young and deeply closeted gay teenager as he navigates the 1980's and 1990's yearning for love and trying to find where he fits in.
This story is rated M because it contains elements of death (including children), homophobia, religi...
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Bruce stopped talking, and just sat there looking at me, waiting for a reaction. I recounted the story in my mind, trying to untangle this weird tale. Finally, I spoke.
"You know what? That's pretty God-damned fucked up. That is the most convoluted, weird-ass, bullshit story I have ever heard."
"It's not bullshit! I promise! It's weird, I know, but it is the gospel truth! Once you meet my wife you'll see..."
"You're making a pretty bold assumption there, thinking that I have any desire or intention to meet your wife."
"Carmen, please..."
"Bruce, I told you from the start that I did not want to be somebody's side piece. You assured me that it wouldn't be the case, after you told me that you were bi. Remember that? 'You have to appreciate what you've got and make it work', you said. That was all bullshit, I see it now, but even though you weren't being honest, I was. I want a steady relationship. I don't want to be somebody's 'mistress' that he keeps on the side when his wife isn't cutting it."
"It wasn't bullshit! I meant what I said! You just don't understand the unique situation that I'm in. You wouldn't be a 'side piece'. My wife would fully accept you, and you'd have me for five days out of seven. It would be no different than having a boyfriend who worked on a fishing boat or oil rig and went away regularly."
"Except that I would hope my boyfriend wasn't fucking the other fishermen or rig workers while he was there. You'd be going home to fuck your wife every weekend."
"Well, if that bothered you, you could always..."
"Always what, Bruce? Have a side piece of my own? I am not like that. I know you hardly know me, but I'd have hoped you'd think better of me than that. I wouldn't have the heart to be fucking some guy on weekends while my boyfriend was away."
"I was going to suggest that you could join us..."
I came very close to losing my mind right there.
"Are you fucking crazy?!?!? Don't you even dare to suggest something like that! I don't want to fuck your wife, and I don't want to watch you fuck your wife! That's just sick! Besides, you know I'm gay, Bruce. I have no desire to be with a woman. I wouldn't do something like that to a woman even if I could."
Bruce was becoming desperate. "Ok, ok! I was just joking, trying to lighten the mood!"
"Were you, Bruce? Were you really?"
"Yes I was! My wife would never go for something like that! She'd kill me for even suggesting it! Look, I know it isn't ideal. I know it's a strange situation. All I'm asking is that you give it a chance. Give me a chance. If it doesn't work out you can always walk away. What harm could come of it?"
I just sat there looking at him. I wanted to say 'The harm that could come of it, Bruce, is that I could become even more attached to you than I was already becoming. The harm is that you could break my heart. Again. The harm is that I could get hurt in a way that I promised myself I would never let happen.'
