Starry Serendipity || R.A.B

29. Valerie and the astronomy tower

January 1976

The anticipation in the Gryffindor common room is palpable as we prepare for Lily's birthday party. The room is adorned with decorations, and a festive atmosphere fills the air. Everyone is in high spirits, chatting and laughing, excited for the celebration.

As the evening arrives, I find myself stealing glances at the calendar on the wall. It's the end of January, and while we should be focused on Lily's celebration, my mind drifts to the past month which has been a battle, one I've been fighting mostly in silence.

The habit of smoking has become my secret solace, a way to calm the unease that constantly churns within me. The familiar scent of cigarettes has woven itself into my days, a comforting presence amidst the chaos. It's a release, a temporary distraction from the turmoil that resides beneath the surface.

James's first reaction to the smell of cigarettes on me was explosive, but I held my ground. I fiercely defended my choices, my right to make them. Remus tried talking to me but it was quite useless seeing as he also smokes, the same goes for Sirius.

My walls have gone up, and I've become more closed off, more guarded. I eat less, ensuring however that my internal struggles remain hidden from prying eyes.

But there's someone who seems to be peering beyond those walls, someone I didn't expect. Regulus, with his piercing gray eyes has an uncanny ability to see through facades, so he has obviously taken notice. After the first time by the Lake, he's developed the peculiar habit of stealing my cigarettes whenever he catches me smoking.

The party begins with a lively energy, and I make a conscious effort to ensure that James is suitably distracted by his relentless pursuit of Lily. His attempts at flirting are met with her usual resistance, a dance they've engaged in for years.

As their banter continues, I slip away to the refreshment table. My eyes scan the array of beverages until they settle on the magical alcohol. With a sense of urgency, I reach for a couple of glasses and fill them with the potent liquid. The familiar burn of anticipation thrills through me as I down both glasses in quick succession.

The alcohol slides down my throat, leaving a fiery trail that warms me from the inside out. As the warmth spreads through me, it's as if the chill that constantly clings to my bones finally begins to recede.

I hold onto the sensation, savoring it for as long as I can. The music surrounds me, the rhythm syncing with the newfound warmth in my veins. For once, I feel a sense of ease, a loosening of the tension that habitually coils within me.

The laughter and chatter of the people around me becomes a gentle hum in the background, their joy a contrast to the shadows that have taken up residence in my mind. I close my eyes briefly, allowing myself to be carried away by the moment, by the sensation of being unburdened by my worries, even if just for a short while.

It's a bittersweet realization that the firewhisky's embrace is temporary, that eventually, the chill will return, both within and without. But for now, I let myself revel in the warmth, in the fleeting sense of peace it brings. I take a deep breath, the air mixing with the remnants of the alcohol's burn, and I decide to dance.

The pulsating rhythm of the music envelopes the room, an irresistible invitation to abandon all inhibitions. In the midst of the festivities, Sirius emerges from the crowd, his steps unsteady but his energy infectious. A joyful grin stretches across his face as he locks eyes with me, his expression conveying a mix of excitement and mischief.

With an unabashed exuberance, he begins to jump up and down, his movements exaggerated and carefree. I can't help but laugh at his antics, his unapologetic abandon contagious. As he lets out a raucous cheer, I'm drawn into his orbit, the music coursing through my veins, encouraging me to let go of my own reservations.