I watch you like a hawk _Oli Sykes Fanfiction

Chapter 59

Kat's POV:

"Don't ask me to watch

While you're killing yourself" _ Long Road, Blitz Kids

"Kitty, Kitty you need to get out."

I stayed quiet, squeezing my eyes shut as I leaned my head back against the bathroom door.

"Kitty you can't stay inside here. Kitty please."

I whimpered, tears springing to my eyes.

"It's okay. I'm not mad. Just, please, open the door."

Biting my lip, I finally gave in and, standing on shaky legs, I unlocked the door.

"Oh god Kitty!" Ash exclaimed and pulled me to him roughly. "You scared us so much."

"I'm sorry," I whimpered.

"It's okay."

"I'm sorry I lied to you..."

"Did you really think you fooled me?" He whispered fiercely in my ear. "I had Chris give me real updates."

"I wanted you to have fun on your tour, and now you're here. I'm always ruining everything for you."

"Shut up! It's not true. I love you, Kitty. I want to know everything, all the bad and the good, and I want to be there for you. I need to, okay? Because you're my best friend and that's what best friends do. Hell, you're my sister! You can't just expect me to go on tour and forget all about you!"

"It just wanted you to have a break from all my problems," I sighed into his shoulder.

"I don't want a break from your problems, I want your problems to disappear. I'm gonna help you get better, okay?"

"I cut again," I admitted, my lower lip quivering. "I'd been clean for almost a week and everything was going better and now— It's like I'm back where I started."

"Show me."

Keeping my eyes down, I showed him my wrist. He sucked in a sharp breath. Yeah, it wasn't a pretty sight. It was aggressively red from me not cleaning my wounds, the words standing out boldly against my death pale skin, cut deeply again and again in the sensitive area. It looked horrible and would inevitably leave an ugly scar. I suppose the rest of me didn't look to well either. Two days locked inside a bathroom would do that to you.

"Kitty—" Ash sighed and hugged me again.

I'd missed his voice, his warmth, his smell. I'd missed my brother.

"When did you arrive?" I asked him, my voice coming out croaked.

"This morning. Chris called me saying it was urgent and I took the first plane. We cancelled tonight's show."

"No, don't do that. You can just go back, live your life. I'll be fine."

"Kitty have you not been listening to what I said? Your safety is more important. The fans will understand."

I shook my head somberly and he glared at me.

"When did you last eat?"

I opened my mouth to answer—closed it.

"I can't remember," I muttered.

I hadn't eaten in the two past days, but even before then, I couldn't remember.

"Okay we're getting you something to eat now."

"I don't want—I can't face the others!" I said frantically.