Janitors Closet [gxg]

☆Chapter Thirty Five

I chugged down the glass of hot water in an attempt to soothe the pain that kept penetrating my throat. With every breath Leah's image found its way to the front of my mind, weighing down the tears that waltzed from my eyes. I poured myself another glass to ease my mind and transition it to happier thoughts. The bottle of pills eyed me from the left side of the room and I averted my gaze as another drop of water slid down my throat. You don't need them. I repeated this mantra ten more times before finishing my third glass of hot water and pushing myself to stand. 

I watched with a fixated gaze as Leah opened the passenger side door for Laura. The happy gleam in their eyes as they held on to each other as if they would never let go. That used to be us. Hate rose in me and my hands began trembling. Unconsciously I reached for my pills, ready to substitute the pain. 

"What are you doing here?"

Her voice pulled me from my thoughts and her green eyes held mine for what felt like an eternity. "I-I" my words failed me and the disappointment was evident on her face. 

"Were you following me?" 

I caught sight of the concerned expression on Laura's face behind her as she pretended to be busy with her phone. "No"

"You were"

"I wasn't" I was in no mood to argue but I knew she wouldn't give up so easy.

"Don't let it happen again" She posed her statement as a threat and she was ready to leave all too soon.

"Not again" My two word plea was enough to turn her around. She knew exactly what I meant

"I was never in love with you" 

That was always true. "But you love me"

"Loved" She corrected me. 

This frustrated me. Her denying what we had, what we still have. Her eyes still held mine and I searched her expression for the same emotion I bottled up within me. Regret, depression, guilt, desire, but I found none of those things in her. "I miss you" My words came out desperate and with pain. 

"I have to go" 

I took a deep breath as I allowed the pills to roll to the floor.

You don't need them.