Finding Paris - (gxg)

Chapter 41

Cassidy was packing her thing again, she was going to Italy tomorrow morning and although her stay in Scotland had been very brief it felt longer. She had yet to see her sister, she was adamant on avoiding her after she heard that Cassidy was home.

It annoyed her, her little sister had a way of annoying her that no one else knew how to.

The sound of the front door downstairs opening and closing made Cassidy stop and head downstairs in a hurry. Her sister had no way of avoiding her now, she knew it wasn't her grandma because she was in her room. It had to be Alessia.

And it was.

Her sister's brown eyes met her's and she muttered a curse under her breath that was loud enough for Cassidy to hear.

"There you are." Cassidy said.

"And I go again." Alessia turned around to open the door but Cassidy ran and shut it back closed again. "Get out of my way."

"Time we talk."

"You don't get to decide when it's time we talk Cassidy. Not everything is when you decide." Her little sister glared at her.

"Too bad, because I'm the only one willing to take the step. How long are you going to keep resenting me?"

"All my life." She pushed past me but I went to obstruct her way again.

"That is not fair!"

"Fair? Where you fair with me to begin with?" Alessia pushed her sister multiple times, she wanted to punch her to let out of all her anger but didn't.

Cassidy didn't fight back but attempted to grab her hands to stop her now blows against her chest. "Stop it Alessia!"

She took a hold of her sister but in the mist of that received a head-but on the face, pissing her off and pushing her sister back—the two of them getting into a full on fight, swatting, pushing and slapping each other.

"What in god's name is happening here!" Nan Rose's voice boomed through the house making the sisters stop the fighting. "Up the two of you, you are too bloody grown to be fighting like children!"

They both listened to their grandma and stood up from the floor—Alessia still glaring at her sister while Cassidy looked at her grandmother.

"What's happened now? Are you two never going to act your age and figure things out?"

Cassidy bit her lip before speaking, "I tried and she wouldn't even let me speak."

"Because I don't want to hear it." Alessia shot back.

"Alessia hush, this is enough you are family. Things can be resolved by communicating if not now then when? I will not be here forever, what will happen then? I know that it's me that's keeping you two even seeing each other at all. Doesn't that sadden you?" Nan Rose looked at the both of her granddaughters.

"I'm sorry Alessia." Cassidy rather blurted out. Her sister still didn't look at her. "I'm sorry I couldn't be the sister you needed me to be. I couldn't."

"That's because you have never put anyone before you in your life. You are the only thing that matters to you." Alessia looked at her with a burning glare and watery eyes.

That was true, used to be true at least, but her sister didn't know that.

"You don't love anyone but yourself." Alessia spoke through gritted teeth.

"That's not true." Cassidy was holding back her own tears. "Just because I couldn't be the older sister that everyone expected me to be doesn't mean I didn't love you. Do you even remember what it was like when mom and dad died? How it was during their funeral? Everyone would just talk about you, 'poor Alessia just lost her parents' — they would come and tell me I had to take care of you, that I was your older sister so I had to look out for you now. I had to be strong for you, it was always you, you and you. Nobody cared about how I was feeling but they were my parents too! I was mourning too, and I— I was a kid who just lost her parents too... I couldn't fill the role that so many expected me for you. I was grieving and turned away from you, I am sorry for that because it must have made you feel more alone than you probably felt... and it made you hate me."

The living room was dead silent when Alessia ended her rant. Grandma Rose's own eyes stung with tears, she fell like she had failed her granddaughters by being how oblivious to how deep the damage really was.

And Alessia saw things from her sister's perspective for the first time.

"You have all your right to be mad at me, I get it. I ignored you I wasn't there for you, I completely shut you out during our teenage years... I ran away. But I'm asking you for a chance to make things right Alessia, you are my sister I don't want to keep living like this with you. I don't want you to keep hating me." Cassidy was freely crying now. She missed her sister, she missed laughing with her, gossiping with her, failing to learn how to bake with her, playing in the snow with her. Just having her sister. She missed it all.

"I don't hate you." Alessia finally spoke, "I could never hate you you idiot."

Cassidy chuckled and looked at the floor, "It sure felt like you did."

"I'm sorry..." Alessia's voice trembled.

She shook her head, "Don't apologize—"

Cassidy couldn't fully comprehend when her sister came and engulfed her in a hug. She was shocked by it, so much it took her a minute to begin to reciprocate it.

The last time her sister and her had hugged her was during their parents funeral. After that Cassidy avoided her sister like the plague and then Alessia didn't want anything to do with her.

It felt like forever ago. Maybe it could be considered that.

"I just wanted my sister to be there, that's all." Alessia mumbled against her.

"I'm here, I'm here now I promise." She responded.

Alessia didn't know how much she needed to hear her sister care for her. Ever since her parents died she thought Cassidy secretly resented her... it was a relief to see that it was not the case.

Cassidy hugged her so tightly she was afraid she would hurt her. "Let me make things right, I can be the sister you deserve now Lessi."

"We both can do better, Nan is right enough time has passed, we both were hurting we both suffered. Now we have to look forward and be there for each other... we are family." Alessia didn't stop hugging her sister. She didn't know just how much she needed this.

"Thank God." They heard their grandmother say as she was now sat on the couch watching them.

Cassidy sighed and kept hugging her little sister, "I'm sorry." She repeated again to her.

Cassidy felt like there will never be enough times to say it.

"It's okay, I promise."

—

A/N - Kind of short yeah but... thoughts?