𝙈𝙔 𝙎𝘼𝙈𝙐𝙍𝘼𝙄 | 𝙆. 𝙏𝘼𝙉𝙅𝙄𝙍𝙊 | 𝙎 𝙄𝙄

Arc 9, Revelations; One Thought

TRIGGER WARNINGS: Off screen rape, panic, trauma, and self hate.

(If you are uncomfortable with these topics please leave now and skip to the next chapter)

Arc 9, Revelations; One Thought
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"Ayumi!" My eyes open, the kitchen around me blurry and disoriented as I hear my aunt call out for me. Standing quickly, I notice how much smaller I feel then usual. Walking into the laundry room maroon eyes scanning the room for the cause of distress.

"Yes Aunty?" The world blends into redness, something about the smile on her face making me nauseated while she closes the door behind me, back colliding with the door as she pins me in place.

Though being shorter, A sort of assertion and aggression comes with her actions, opposite hand reaching for my collar to pull me closer to her.

"I think you should help me . . . " The scenery changes as suddenly we are lying on the floor, or rather I am while she straddles me. Pushing me down against the cold tile, force behind her movements while my heart speeds up in terror, painful thuds against my ribcage.

"Auntie . . . get off. This isn't okay." She leans back, zipping down her dress while looking into my eyes with a condescending look, breathing quickening as she pushes her hips down further.

Tears spring to my eyes as I am truly fearful, hating every second of what is happening. "Come on, you'll enjoy this. Besides, what good is a man if he can't pleasure a woman?"

My eyes widen, shaking in fear while she undressed me, hands working hastily despite my repeated futile efforts to talk sense. "Stop. Stop!"

Her hand slams against my mouth, my head slamming against the wall, tears slipping down my face at the harsh pain. "Shut up and take it. I'll kill you if you don't. Stupid boy."

I begin to blackout as she reaches down, the walls closing in while I hyperventilate, endless tears streaming down my face at the feeling of her torture.

Remaining quiet to avoid getting hurt. Heart squeezed with the overwhelming pressure of the world around me, wondering why this is happening as it doesn't stop.

It never stops.

My entire vision goes black before my eyes open to a new view, shooting up from my bed while gasping for air.

"It wasn't real . . . she can't hurt you anymore . . . you're safe . . . " Tears flowing down my face, filled with anger and hatred as I remember what happened to me, and the words I used with other women.

I hate myself.

It happened to me, I knew how bad it felt.
Yet I still said those words to Y/n.
To others.

Breathe. Putting my hands up to my chest, thumbs interlaced while I tap twice on my left, twice on my right. Repeating the pattern till my heart beat matches the tapping slow pace.

Punching my pillow, before realizing the cause of being woke up. Looking over to my phone, the device aggressively vibrating with a bright red notification on the screen.