Dum Spiro Spero

Chapter 8

Evalyn made a trip over the holidays to the abandoned Potter Manor. She wanted to find something special to give to Harry, anything that would have meaning. Most of the house at Godric's Hollow was destroyed in the attack, but protection spells kept a few small items safe. They had moved the few good boxes of odds and ends into the Manor. Evalyn had yet to go through any of them, so she was unsure if she'd even find anything.

First she stopped by James old room. Various quidditch posters still hung on the dusty walls. She dug through the drawers and pulled out a specific jumper. The name Potter in bold letters on the back along with his quidditch number. It made her furious that nobody thought he would want any of this stuff. She lifted a box onto the dingy red bedsheets and pulled out a few items. His and Lily's Head Boy and Girl badges, the muggle pregnancy test that Lily took when she thought she was pregnant, Harry's first baby blanket. The last thing in this box was a book, a muggle cookbook to be exact. James' messy handwriting held notes in the margins. Evalyn flipped through the pages, before an envelope appeared. Her name was scratched onto it. She carefully set everything aside and opened it up.

Evie,

I wanted to apologize for not being there for you more. I missed your birthday, and I'm sure I will miss Padfoot's. I never miss birthdays and it has been driving me bonkers.

This war has taken a toll on everyone and I thank you for being there for me, Lily and Harry. I know we didn't become close until our later years, but I couldn't ask for a better sister, a better godmother to my child.

I don't know if we will all make it through this, as much as it pains me to say it. I feel like my time is coming soon. If something happens to me, I know that my family will be in good hands with you. Do not let this war consume you. You are good. You are strong. Your heart is a beautiful thing that will keep you going.

My Harry is crying in the next room, so this letter is going to be cut short. There are a million other things I could say. But always remember, I love you Evie.

Love your brother in all but blood,
James F. Potter

The heartbreak she felt was on another level. Her heart raced and the rage combined with the sadness. She carefully set aside the things she would take with her and made her way into the backyard. The garden that used to be full of herbs was wilted and cobwebs filled the corners. She fell to her knees and screamed. Thunderclouds rolled in and the rain poured around her. Her trousers and sweater were completely soaked, and the rain caused her plaits to fall loose.

All of a sudden she was pulled to her feet and hoisted up into someone's arms. The strong emotions caused her to pass out in the person's embrace. It was unclear how long she was out, but she awoke back at Hogwarts, in Remus' office. Her eyes burned from all of the tears shed and her throat was scratchy from the screaming. The sound of her shuffling startled Remus. He immediately walked over to her and knelt down. Worry was sketched all over his face. "Evalyn how are you feeling?"

"Did you bring me back?"

He furrowed his brows, unsure who else she thought would bring her back here. "Of course, a neighbor called me and said some weird storm clouds showed up above the Manor."

"I failed him. I failed James." She burrowed into the covers, trying to hide from the guilt. "I couldn't protect them, and I couldn't protect Harry. I couldn't take care of him the way he wanted. He's stuck with those monsters who treat him like rubbish and he goes here where someone is trying to kill him every single year."

"Evalyn, look at me." Her misty green eyes peaked out from underneath the covers. The werewolf's heart clenched seeing them all red and puffy. "You have not failed him. There are many who have, but not you. You are the only one who has spent many restless nights fighting for this boy. You -" he patted the top of her head. "You would have made James proud."