VOL 4 Chapter 8 Apologies

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The time for the debate is already up, the time required is one hour, if we wanted we could stay longer, but the atmosphere is not right for that. It's a small victory for   Seong.

We all started to leave. I was only able to give the image of someone violent and vulgar who is capable of responding to that guy.

I leave without   Satou   and   Ike  . We have to meet again later, at that time I will return to get the group up and running. We can't just hold the knife to the other person's neck.

As I walked I felt someone approaching.

Shiina : This….  Hikigaya   -  kun  ?

It's   Shiina   Hiyori , accompanied by Albert.

Hachiman : Are you  Shiina -san? 

Shiina  : Right, I'm glad you remember my name.

It's something normal, right? In addition to the fact that it is impossible to forget her, she is a very good person who cares about her classmates and the other people in the other classes. She maybe the same idealist as   Honami . She's just less active.

Hachiman : Do you have any business with me?

Shiina : Huh? Yes, I just wanted to apologize for   Seong-kun's behavior.

Hachiman : Why are you apologizing for him?

Shiina : I feel like we owe you an apology, even more so knowing that...... You had an altercation.

Hachiman : Did he tell you?

Shiina  : I only know a few details.

Hachiman : Then it's okay, look, I know you're worried about your classmate, you still shouldn't apologize for him, he has to take that responsibility himself.

Shiina : I know, but he…..

Hachiman : He's not the type to apologize, we already know that, I'm just saying that if he continues to be so angry, he will reach the point of being uncontrollable, and you, who are neither his friend or girlfriend, can do something about it .

Her sad look pierces my heart. I must harden my will,   Seong   is not someone who deserves this girl to lower her head.

Hachiman : *sigh* listen, even if I try to avoid him with all my might he's going to come for me.

Shiina : Does that mean you will fight again?

Hachiman : Most likely, but it will depend on him, so you can rest assured that I am not going to be the one looking for problems nor will I involve other people, it is a dispute that only we will solve.

Shiina : I see… I'm sorry, if I was insistent on him.

Hachiman  : Don't worry,   Shiina  -san, you're too kind to be in   Ryuuen's class.

Shiina :   Hehehe , thanks for the compliment. Truly forgive the actions of my classmates, they are good kids, they are just a little off.

Hachiman  : I wouldn't say a little. 

She scratches her head in embarrassment. 

Hachiman : Sorry, that was a rude thing for me to say.

Shiina : Don't worry   Hikigaya-kun  . 

With this she turns to the other side and together with Albert he has not said a word they leave, without first turning one last time and saying.

Shiina : See you later,   Hikigaya-kun .

Albert just nods his head. What a strange girl, I don't know if she is kind or stupid.

She raised my hand to say goodbye.

He checked my cell phone, there are several messages from   Yousuke  who wants to meet with me, there are also other messages from   Horikita   and   Kikyo . For the moment I will meet with   Yousuke.

We decided to meet in one of the hallways. I sit on one of the benches, luckily there is a vending machine nearby, and I buy a coffee while I wait.

Here comes the aforementioned number one boy in class B. Always with a smile and a face so handsome that you want to hit him.

Yousuke : Hello,  Hachiman-kun.

Hachiman : Hello.

He sits next to me, I bought a can of green tea for him, I give it to him.

Yousuke : You are unexpectedly hospitable.

Hachiman : Do you want me to take the can from you?

He opens it quickly and begins to drink from it. That way he tells me that he's not going to let her take it away.

Hachiman : How did it go?

Yousuke : As you can imagine, it was quite tense. The relationship between   Katsuragi   and  Ryuuen  looks very broken, the failure caused the alliance to break. Although  Ryuuen  is strangely cooperative in pursuing result 1.

Hachiman : That sounds bad, the words cooperation and   Ryuuen  do not go together.

Yousuke : That's the strange thing, there is no guarantee that what he says is true, he must have a hidden hand.

Hachiman : We must be patient, it is only the first debate, we just have to wait how things develop.

Yousuke : How did it go in your group?

Hachiman : Terrible,   Seong   is a bigger stone than I thought.

Yousuke : Sounds like you got into trouble.

Hachiman : Don't make him see that it's my fault, although I was able to stop him temporarily, I don't know what other tricks he has up his sleeve.

Yousuke  : This…   Hachiman-kun  , Besides this, I wanted to talk to you about something else. This is  Karuizawa -san.

This is going to be annoying.

Hachiman : Tell me.

Yousuke : Apparently   Karuizawa  -san is being bothered by   Manabe  -san's group.

Hachiman : If it were that simple you would be able to solve it.

Yousuke: Right, the problem is that Karuizawa-san pushed one of Manabe-san's friends, Morofuji-san, at the beginning of the summer vacation. And they just want Karuizawa-san to apologize to her.

That idiot.

Hachiman : Let me guess, and   Kei , she doesn't want to do it.

Yousuke : Yes, I just want both parties to reach an agreement.

Hachiman : You know it's impossible with the dominant character she's playing.

Yousuke : What she are doing is not right, with just an apology you could end this.

Hachiman : I agree. But that girl is very stubborn.

Yousuke : *sigh* after we finished the debate, she came asking for my help, I could only reject her, this is out of my hands.

Hachiman : The most likely thing is that she comes to me.

Yousuke : What will you do?

Hachiman  : Yousuke , I'm about to do something you might consider evil.

Yousuke  : I trust you.

Hachiman : Very good. We will abandon   Karuizawa   Kei.

Yousuke : Huh?

Hachiman : Before you start asking let me explain first. My promise is that I would protect her in case something went wrong, but in this case it is because of   Kei  's own recklessness that things went wrong.   Kei   has to realize her mistake, if we continue to protect her when she is in danger, the existence of the little harassed girl will never disappear, she will be a ghost that will haunt her until she dies .

Yousuke : It's something extreme. But you're right. If she continues like this, he can only rise to greater heights.

Hachiman : Then I'm going to start ignoring her calls and messages. I suggest you do the same.

Yousuke  : But if we don't do something about   Manabe  -san's group, it may cause problems.

Hachiman : Do you know who in the class is in her group?

Yousuke  : This… I think   Ayanokouji   -  kun ,   Yukimura-kun   and   Sotomura   -  kun.

Hachiman :   Kiyotaka   is there, if he comes asking for some information you can   tell him.

Yousuke : Are you sure?   Karuizawa  -san won't be happy about it.

Neither do I, but I have to confront him before it's too late.

Hachiman : I'm sure, you can tell him about your fake relationship and   Kei 's past. You have to leave me out of all this.

Yousuke : I understand. You have to have a plan, like I said, I'm going to trust you.

Hachiman : Thank you, I'm sorry for having to cast you as the bad guy.

Yousuke : If this helps   Karuizawa -san somehow overcome her past, it will be worth it.

I looked at him, this boy is too good. But at the same time a little sad.

Yousuke : What's with that expression? Let me guess, you're wondering why I go to such lengths to help  Karuizawa -san.

Hachiman : More or less.

Yousuke  : I haven't told you about my past, it's time for you to know why I was placed in class D.

Are you going to tell me? Although in ways I know, but I just have to listen to what he has to say.

Yousuke : As you know, the reason I accepted   Karuizawa -san's request to be her boyfriend was to help her 'protect herself'. That's what she asked me for. As expected during her elementary and middle school years, for 9 years, she suffered a horrible amount of bullying.

I could have ended up just like her.

Yousuke : Of course I met   Karuizawa -san just upon entering this school, but I understand. I know the look, the scent, and the presence of a person who has been a victim of harassment. By taking advantage of her position as my girlfriend,   Karuizawa -san would be able to escape from her past. But right now I think that the attitude she shows is not that of the real   Karuizawa   of acting desperately tough, right? You were right when you told us that she was not the solution to eradicate the problem.

Hachiman : Still, why did you consider accepting his offer?

Yousuke  : It's a story that carries my sin. I'm going to tell you from the   beginning. If   I had to say it honestly, until my second year of high school I was an average kid who didn't stand out too much. 

Hachiman : Sorry, but average? You must be kidding.

Yousuke : i didn't stand out too much, but i wasn't invisible either. My friend was like that too. A friend I   got along   really well with since we were kids,   Sugimura-kun  . For six years in primary school we were in the same class together. And since we were neighbors we always went to and from school together. 

I can feel the nostalgia of those times. It's not something I can relate to, I've never had friends.

Yousuke : When we entered high school, for the first time we were in different classes. But still, we kept going back and forth home together. But the days we did that gradually began to decline and I started playing with other kids in my new class. It's a normal story that you could hear anywhere.

It's normal for people to separate.

Yousuke  : But, you see… while I was busy having fun with my new friends, on the other hand,   Sugimura-kun   was being bullied.   Sugimura-kun   asked me for help many, many times. He often appeared with a bruised face and wounds everywhere. But I chose to prioritize my new friends and never take him seriously.   Sugimura-kun , who originally had an impulsive personality, always used to fight with others so I never thought deeply about his situation. When we reached the second year of high school we were brought together again. But at this point,   Sugimura-kun   looked devastated. The image of him radiant and joyful was no longer there, only marks from punches and kicks remained. They didn't even allow him to go to the bathroom, so he would do himself in the middle of class. That kind of thing became… routine.

I hate that.

Hachiman : I see, then you….

Yousuke: Yes. I think you understand. I did not do anything. I couldn't do anything. I was very afraid that I would become the new target. I was afraid that they would destroy my peaceful life... and I continued to pretend not to see the situation of   Sugimura-kun , who had always been with me. I believed that one day the bullies would get bored of him. Or that one day   Sugimura   would stop coming to school and then the bullying would stop. Or that maybe someone would step up and save him. I kept convincing myself with things like that…

Hachiman : What happened to him in the end?

Yousuke  : Even now the memory of that day is etched in my mind. After morning soccer practice, I returned to my classroom. There I saw   Sugimura-kun   and decided to wait before entering. Honestly at that moment, I felt uncomfortable. Even though he was a friend I had played with since we were kids, at that point he was almost like a stranger to me. I couldn't help but have cruel thoughts about how I could be bullied alongside him. Maybe   Sugimura-kun   didn't say anything. And almost as a plea for help he saw my dark heart, but... that day, in the middle of class, he jumped out of the window.

Hachiman : …….. he Died?

Yousuke : He was declared brain dead. But even today his parents are still waiting for   Sugimura-kun  to recover. Whether he is alive or dead now I don't know. The events of that day were so surreal that I still wonder if it was just a dream or some hallucination. That's how incredible it was. From that moment on I was aware. That by worrying about myself, I led a friend to his death. 

Hachiman : I see, that's why you want to help her, but unfortunately you want to save the two groups.

Yousuke : I'm not a hero or a vigilante, I just want to save the people in front of me, it's a way to redeem my sins.

Hachiman : You're quite stupid.

Yousuke : You telling me that makes me angry in a way.

That kindness will lead to ruin, because unfortunately you cannot save everyone in front of you. But we'll leave that for later.

Hachiman : Since you told me about yourself, I'm going to tell you a little about myself.

Yousuke : You don't have to.

Hachiman : It's not that I have but that I want to tell you, maybe it will give you a new perspective. I told you that I was harassed too.

He nods.

Hachiman : Well, I was an outcast, they started playing little pranks like hiding my shoes or my supplies. Then they started insulting and progressed further.

  Yousuke  's expression turns sour, it's a normal story about bullying.

Hachiman : However, they did not continue advancing, I think you already know why, I broke the faces of everyone who crossed my path.

A complicated expression replaces Yousuke's face.

Yousuke  : Was it the right solution?

Hachiman: mmmmm , I would say yes, it just brought a lot of problems, when I hit my bullies, they didn't stay with their arms crossed, they called their friends, I hit them again, this time they called their older brothers, another time the same process was repeated, until it got to the point where no one would approach me.

Yousuke : That……

Hachiman : Yes, I know, it's my fault, violence is a vicious circle that only the strong can break whenever they want. From those moments I spent my days desolate. And I began to hate the strong.

Yousuke : Huh? What are you talking about?

Hachiman : It's how you heard it, since I was no longer a target, they looked for new targets, that bothered me, so I hit them again, I created a vicious circle again, and I created them everywhere, guys trying to rob cars and old men, men trying to abuse girls, in the end I broke all of their bodies. To the point where it was just routine.

Yousuke : W-wait, were you doing it for other people?

Hachiman : From a third party's point of view I could be considered a hero or something, but I did it for myself, I didn't protect the weak, I only destroyed the strong. That's how I earned the fury of many people, in the end they all ended up at my feet. That's why when I entered this school I wanted to forget a little about the past.

Yousuke  : In the end, you are still as kind as I thought.

Hachiman : Hey, didn't you just hear what I said? I said it was because of my own selfishness that I did it, I never cared about other people.

Yousuke :   Hahahahahahahahahaha , I see that you still don't understand it, your actions may have been motivated by your selfishness as you say, but that doesn't take away from the merit that you changed the lives of several people, that's why it's I trust that you will be able to save  Karuizawa -san.

Hachiman : How biased of you.

Yousuke : I know.

I get up from my seat, it's time for us to meet again for the second session of the day. 

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