Save Me Because I Can't Save Myself (Patrick Stump)

Chapter 14

Patrick's POV
After Brendon gets us to leave I just sit on the floor with my head in my hands. I could of stopped this. If only she'd told me she was feeling that way. I could of helped her. I'm scared of loosing her, I have now realised I love her. I can't loose her especially not now.

Brendon comes back into the lounge 1 hour or so later. I'm guessing Anna's back in bed. But there's a question bugging me. "Did she..?" I can't say it. Cut, self harm. Both horrible words. "Not really" Tells me. How can it be not really?

"She dug her nails into her skin, she didn't have a blade with her" Only cause I took it. I'm so stupid. I should of known she'd run to the bathroom upset with us all. I was just annoyed at Brendon for not telling me that I didn't think about her. "Patrick this isn't your fault" Pete says trying to convince me. I agree with him just to get him to shut up.

"I'm going to bed" I say getting up from where I was sitting. Everyone says night and I walk over to the bunks. Wait do I sleep in mine? Or should I go join Anna. She's probably asleep. Would that be weird? I decide against it and go to my own bunk and get into something comfier than jeans.

I get into bed and try to sleep but it's not happening. I keep blaming myself for what happened. Maybe music will help calm me down. Just as I'm about to press play I get a text from Anna.
Patrick can you come and be with me until I sleep, I don't like being alone right now-A
That makes me worry about her. But kind of glad she texted me instead of deciding on being alone
Sure :)-P

Anna's POV
I don't trust myself being alone. Everyone thinks I'm asleep but I don't want to bother them after what I've already put them through today. My mind is telling me to go and end all of this before anyone can stop me but I keep remembering the look on Patrick's face when he saw my arms. Stupid, why did I even anyway? I don't know.. But now I feel horrible.

I need Patrick before I do something bad.
Patrick can you come and be with me until I sleep, I don't like being alone right now-A
I text nearly in tears already just from thinking about what I feel like doing. What if he's asleep? Then maybe Brendon wouldn't be. I don't know I just need someone to be with me right now. Almost instantly I get a message back from him. Sure :)

I move over so there's room for Patrick and go onto Twitter cause I don't know what else to do. Once Patrick gets under the blankets with me I cuddle into him. I shiver for some random reason. I think I'm just nervous of what Patrick thinks of me now. I mean why would he want to be with me when I'm like this? Why would he want to even be with me in general?

I bury my head in his chest even though I'm still wearing my glasses. I let the tears flow from my face, the tears which I have been trying to hold in for ages. I don't care that I'm squishing my glasses but Patrick seems to care. He lifts my head and takes them off. This is when he notices I'm crying. He just pulls me in tighter and wipes the tears with his sleeve.

"I'm sorry..." I can't stop saying. The tears don't seem to stop. Patrick tries calming me down by talking which doesn't really work so he starts to sing.
You gotta keep on keeping on
Even with the feeling that you're gonna keep losing
You gotta come back strong
You gotta keep on keeping on
Even with the feeling that you're gonna keep losing
You gotta come back strong

I take deep breathes and try to calm down. I start smiling when I realise that Patrick was singing a song Brendon sings. "What? Patrick asks confused at why I'm smiling since I was just kind of completely in tears a few minutes ago. "Keep On Keeping On ft Brendon? Right?" "Yeah? It was the first thing I could think of" I just smile and cuddle back into him.

I can feel myself falling asleep already. I guess it's just cause Patrick has a calming presence. I feel him sift to get comfy so I readjust myself to so I'm not annoying Patrick. "Anna promise me you won't do that again" I sigh. "I can't" I say being completely honest "Why not?" He asks concerned. "I don't like breaking promises" I whisper scared of his response. "Anna, please..." He begs with me."Shh just leave it for now, I'm tired" I cut him off trying to change the topic. "Fine" He says kind of sounding upset. I sigh and snuggle into him.

Just as I'm falling asleep I hear Patrick say something. "Anna, I care about you and I don't want what happened to Pete to happen to you. I don't think I could go through that again.." He whispers. I'm to deep into sleeping that I can't answer, I wish I could say it's to late for that. That I'm already there and there's not much that can help. But I can't. To tired and to scared.

(A/N- Sorry that was kinda short and sad)