Doctor's New Boy [1] ( Manxman bdsm) 18+

Forty Three

"I'd love to but I'm not sure if..." I stood there shifting my weight from one foot to the other. "Can we just hang out?"

"Yes Chris. I only offered because you looked like you wanted me to. You don't have to come in, I don't mind."

"I would like to, no one should be alone on their birthday."

"It's not a big deal but come in if you'd like." He turned and walked towards the kitchen. "Would you like a glass of wine? Cake?"

"Only if you are. You can save it for another time if you want. I just felt bad. I know we're sort of a mess but you said you weren't with Eli and... may I ask why not?"

"Why I'm not with Eli?"

"Yeah. Don't you usually spend your birthday with him?"

"I do. But since we no longer have a contract I can't exactly expect him to want to be here, now can I?"

"You don't? What happened?" I grabbed the glass of wine he handed me and sat down on the couch. Fucking MSNBC, it was constant. "I mean, you're not going to tell me obviously. I'll shut up now. Sorry."

"I don't understand your curiosity."

"Really?"

"Really" he answered. "Would you rather watch something else?"

"Nope, birthday boy's choice."

"Why are you here Chris? What do you want from me?" He stood up then to get himself quite a quick refill and brought the bottle back with him. At least he didn't have to drive anywhere. "This is very good."

"One of my favorites. I don't know exactly, Sir. I didn't want you to be alone so here I am. I want to understand I guess. More than anything I just want to know what makes you tick and what WE are."

"I don't do well at unscripted conversations. I like having a purpose, a plan. You told me once that you were bad at first dates but Chris, this feels like one to me. I'm not very good at socializing, at winging things."

"So you WERE a bit flummoxed at dinner the other night? Is that why you left?"

"Yes. I wasn't in a good head space and thought it better to end it early than to say things that would haunt me later." He rubbed at his hand but caught me staring and put it into his pocket.

"I'm not used to seeing you less than one thousand percent in control. It's nice to know you're human. Do you want to talk? Or at least tell me whether or not you're okay? With Eli? I mean, maybe it doesn't matter---"

"It matters! How could it not matter?" He had raised his voice but looked sheepish about it. "Sorry."

"It's okay Sir."

"Would you like a topper?" he asked, changing the conversation.

I looked down at my half-full glass and at his almost empty one. "Sure, thank you."

"Does the cake need to go in the fridge? I guess we could just eat it now and not worry about it."

"It is a small one and I'm sure we could polish it off if you're in the mood. They're very good though, very rich. You don't need much."

"Sounds a bit like you, Chris."

"I'm not sure if that's a compliment or not."

"I meant it as one."

"Good enough for me then Sir. I'll take it." We ate in comfortable silence and listened to the moderators talk about the most recent Republican Presidential Debate. Apparently Greg had watched it because he was quoting things and arguing or agreeing with the speakers. It was really nice to just sit and relax a little bit. I don't know if I would call it 'quality' time after what we'd done just a few rooms down the hall but it was nice.

"I'm going to miss him. I already do." It came out of nowhere after almost half an hour of silence. The cake and wine were both gone and I had actually been ready to offer to leave.

"I'm sorry. You said he was long-term... how long is that?"

"Exactly? Let's see -- one one, four no six three's and eight sixes.... that's five years and seven months."

I didn't mean to exclaim but I did. "Oh my god! Wow. I didn't realize... I mean I guess I just never knew. That's a long time Sir."

"Yes. Rather long."

"I'm sorry." And I was. I won't lie and say that I wasn't a bit jealous in the beginning but I'd figured out that Eli and I were NOT competitors. I couldn't be what he was for Greg, it would never happen. "Did it happen recently? Is that why you were free Saturday?"

"No, his mother died and he went out of town for the funeral. We met last night and discussed it Curious George."

I hated that he was sad but I was almost relieved that he cared. It explained the dirty dishes in his always immaculate kitchen and his personal general state of disarray. "Can I do anything to help?"

"I'm sure you could if you wanted to. But I'm not sure you should."