Maid In Royalty

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March 20th, 2012

The sun shone brilliantly and the virescent colour of the spring day under its glare was offensively bright and cheerful. It was as if they conspired to show me how the world would go on without me. It shouldn't. Everything should be as grey and foggy as my emotions; it should be cold and damp with still air. But the birds still sang, and the flowers again bloomed. I walked through the churchyard like a silhouette of myself, wishing I was as insubstantial as the shadows so that my insides might not feel so mangled. As I took a pew near the front, the long-held back tears began to flow. I was not ashamed. I loved her. Now I was gone a light had been extinguished forever in her heart.

The coffin gleamed in the early morning light that streamed through the cathedral windows. It was built with love to be the final resting place of one who had been so adored in their lifetime. It's faux-gold handles, and polished sheen helped to reduce their trauma to wracking waves that were at least more manageable.

They had to see my mother in something of beauty, something that showed what she had meant to them and me. They laid flowers on the top that would be placed on the gravestone, everything beautiful to hide a reality their hearts could not bear. They brought her here to entrust her to God, to pray that he takes good care of her, as in their hearts they knew he would. But all at once heaven seemed so far away, and they would be glad of this grave to visit when they needed her. Then too they would bring the flowers and imagine her safe and sleeping in this beautiful casket.

The preacher begins to read a passage. My eyes become wet, yet I don't realize my crying until my ribs start to heave like they suddenly weight too much to allow breathing. I turn to leave. Better they think me rude than heartbroken.

I find a nearby bench and places myself on it. Crying is how I understand myself best. When I cried, I know who I am. I weep at the brutal world news and stupid soft movies. It's my strength and my weakness. Powerful because it brings understanding and weak because who wants the listener to weep when they are looking for a strong shoulder? I wish I could turn my tears off. Or perhaps just save it until I am alone, but I am not wired like that. My emotions swirl like ocean currents, deep and strong. Sometimes I am scared to dive in in case I don't make it out again, but I can't be anyone else, I don't suppose any of us can.

He touches my shoulder, and I almost jumped away from him. There wasn't anyone behind me a while ago. He smiles at me as I turn towards him.

"Where were you?" I ask.

"I'm sorry."

His eyes turn glossy as he wipes a single tear away. He wraps his arms around me and kisses me on the cheek. I gasp as my cheeks flush with embarrassment. He smirked and ran away. My hands touch my cheek as I smile. I realize that my tears stopped and my heart was back in its normal condition.

One kiss changed my life.

July 23rd, 2021

"Iris! The kitchen staff needs your help right now!"

As soon as I entered the kitchen I hear someone say, "Iris, mop the floor before you reorganize the back shelf. There's spilled tomato sauce on the floor!"

I nodded and grabbed the mop that was hanging around in the corner of the kitchen. I dusted off the cobwebs that were attached to the wooden part of the broom. Going back and forth cleaning the tomato sauce on the floor as well. Sweat was dripping down my forehead as I wiped it with the back of my hand.

"Iris, the prince has arrived! Make sure the new dishes are displayed well," the head chef whispered.

"Why are you whispering?" I whispered back.