Why Wattpad Drives Me Crazy - Part II

3| What's Hot?

May the 4th be with you

::

I was scrolling through what's hot on the Random sections and 90% of the books were

*drum roll*

Zodiac signs.

Zodiac signs.

Not that I mean to shit on anyone who has a Zodiac Signs book but I target them as a collective - what the fuck?

Like what the actual fuck guys, Zodiac Signs?!

Like try and help me out here.

(1) why?
(2) why?
(3) why??

Perhaps I'd get it if it's only like one ZS book that's really popular but there are so so many in the top thirty alone so it's like wtf, is it that the same readers put like 3000 Zodiac Signs books their library?

What, you want to know your star sign from seventeen different people? Do you need these seventeen people to tell you what character traits you supposedly have or whatever the fuck you should wear this summer?

Like what benefit do they add to your life?

To be fair, I guess like 70% of the books on Wattpad, let alone the random section, add no benefits to your life whatsoever.

(Because they are useless pieces of shit).

#Savage

Heck, WWDMC probably adds no benefits at all. (Unless it makes you laugh which does have a lot of benefits to oneself as laughter decreases stress hormones and increases immune cells and infection-fighting antibodies, thus improving your resistance to disease. Laughter also triggers the release of endorphins, the body's natural feel-good chemicals. Endorphins promote an overall sense of well-being and can even temporarily relieve pain).

(I totally copy-pasted that😂).

And ofc those romance/teen fiction books make you have an alternate universe where you as the uncool ass motherfucking girl can get the hottest billionaire guy

But like...do Zodiac Signs make you laugh?

Do Zodiac Signs enable you to be the girl with the hot billionaire boyfriend?

If not, then I don't get it.

Like I said, I wouldn't mind if it was just one of them up there, but there are so damn many which is slightly concerning...

And the thing is, what people will do is what we call the Barnum effect

#WeDidThisInPhilosophy

It's basically how, just because it's your sign, you'll find a way to definitely relate it to your life.

E.g. - "hey guys! I'm author101, and, here's my post for today!! Cancer sign as a fruit: STRAWBERRY"

Comments:

OMG IM A CANCER AND I LOVE STRAWBERRY SHAMPOO

OMG IM A CANCER AND I EAT STRAWBERRIES EVERYDAY THEREFORE YOU ARE CORRECT

I AM A CANCER AND MY GREAT GRANDFATHER'S DAUGHTER'S UNCLE'S MOTHER-IN-LAW HAD A STRAWBERRY FARM

...because let's just ignore all the Aries, or Pisces, or Virgos, who like strawberries, too.

Another example would be, when they tell you what qualities you supposedly have. Then of course, hello Barnum effect, everyone who shares that sign suddenly is a strong, loquacious, amorous person because they'll ignore all the times they weren't any of those, just to confirm that the zodiac sign is correct.

Because subjective validation. Yea, that's right bitches, I paid attention in class.

Anyway, I am a Taurus btw, just putting that out there.

Hit me up only if you know what hot guys will come up to me this summer and ask for my number.

Or are those for horoscopes?

Are they different things? Omg. Shit me now

::

Btw please don't get offended, this is just for banter. You can have as many books as you want telling you what you are as a vegetable, because that's okay.

My main issue is that none of them told me that Taurus was chicken, and I have a really big problem with that because chicken is life guys can someone tell me that me as a food is chicken please please preferably fried chicken