Why Wattpad Drives Me Crazy - Part II

10| Top 10 Most Overused Descriptions

Thank you! Thank you beautiful reader for reading my book.

WWDMC2 has skyrocketed already, and it's all thanks to you. To celebrate, here's a picture of Dylan O'Brien coz none of you appreciated my Daniel Craig ones smh

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I remember ranting about types of descriptions I hated in #53 of WWDMC where I mentioned all the really annoying descriptions that said shit like "read to find out!" and "will they fall in love?"

Well, after I got over those, I've decided to do one on the top ten (other) overused phrases in descriptions.

1. "Have you ever heard the phrase, 'opposites attract?' Well, PlainJane and BirdName were definitely opposites."

Like seriously, these stories always have to point to that damn phrase. Like honestly, "OPPOSITES ATTRACT" is still a thing? And then of course they go on to describe how "opposite" the two main characters are:

"Jane Prude Summerson is a complete nerd. With glasses and braces on, she's basically invisible.
Jacob Jacobson is, however, a jock, with no glasses and no braces, is seen by everyone, because he's polar af. And now that he has to live with her, the phrase "opposites attract" may not be so correct anymore..."

And then the book goes on to prove how the phrase "opposites attract" is, in fact, correct 😒😒

2. "InsertNameHere is just your average girl..."

I HATE THIS ONE. "Just your average girl."

LIKE STAHHP BECAUSE WE KNOW YOU'RE GOING TO GO ON AND SAY SHE HAD A BIKINI BODY AND SHIT STAAHP

But not even that. What constitutes the word "average"???? And why do they say "your", like "just YOUR average girl", why the hell "your", she is not mine you doofus? Why are you forcing her onto me? What if I have an average girl already? What if my average girl is different from your average girl? Is it that you expect me to arrive at a conclusion about who this girl is just from saying she is "your average girl"? Like is it some magical phrase that everyone will automatically understand??? Because like I said I'm not sure we all have a mutual understanding of what "your average girl" is, and so why can't you stop being lazy and like tell us properly who she is??

Am I digging too deep into this fam??

3. "Skyalasia Bokimaris. Girl of seventeen. Fighter. Warrior. The savior of the planet of Quentin."

Because short sentences apparently make it more badass.

Okay I will admit that sometimes short descriptions are badass as hell (see descriptions of WWDMC1 and WWDMC2 for further reference) but sometimes they just sound stupid af lol

#IAmNarcissus

4. "17 year old Adolph..."

"5 year old Elizabeth..."

"500 year old Giselle..."

"13,245 year old Selelelelelepeleleletitipoo..."

Because it's always awkward introducing age in the book, so just dump it in the damn description.

Like seriously you guys must have stumbled upon a thousand descriptions that start with the character's age. It just annoys me lol like bitch u supposed to catch my attention but the first sentence and you waste it on numbers that don't mean shit??

5. "Titipoosy is smart, funny, cool, sexy, awesome, fun, and fantastic."

Jeez, thanks for giving us a full breakdown of these extremely vague personality traits than do nothing to tell me about the character at all.

Like, I hate to break it to you love, but one ever reads lists. They mean nothing to me, they mean nothing, and I'm sorry you son of a bitch but they don't mean shit to anyone.

Titipoosy was SO deliberate, by the way. Three bad words in one? Yes, please.

6. Hold up, I'm watching TV and Zayn's song is on and I was wondering if anyone likes his music? I can't stand it lol

7. "Insert stupid badass witty quote that bad boy or billionaire smirks at the chick."

E.g.

"You just think you're so cool, huh?" Billy the billionaire bully billowed at me.

Okay okay that's not the example, I was just in the mood to make a tongue twister.

The truth is, I'm really not bothered to give you an example.

In fact, I'm not even bothered to continue this rant because I'm too lazy ahahahahahahhaahhahahahhahahhahahhahhahahahahahahahahagahahahahhagAGAGAGGAGAGAHAHHHAAGAGAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHSGSHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAAHgoeatadickAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAJAJAJJAJAJAJA

Spot the sweet message in there

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I promise I wasn't high while writing this rant lolz.

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