Past Memories

That's Rich Coming From an Alpha

Tomboy of the Pack

Chapter Eighteen

Rae's POV

I snuggled deeper into the fur coat behind me. I knew he was there. I knew that was his paw over my wolf form. I knew that was his snout dug into my neck with his warm breath heating up the one specific area but I didn't care. I wanted to savour this feeling of security that surrounded me, something I haven't felt in a while.

I felt the paw being removed before a tongue cleaned an area of my neck. Rolling over, I saw Mason's wolf stare back at me, his eyes widening slightly as if he hadn't realised I was awake. I tilted my head.

'Are you okay?'

Mason's wolf licked my check, 'Yeah.'

I buried my face back down into his chest, concealing the warmth. But it was also for another reason. 'I-I had a memory of Blake.' I didn't want to see the angry snarl that came from him. I didn't want to see his eyes darken.

'What was it about?' he asked, anger evident in his voice.

'I-It was only small but it was of him yelling about some gem, telling me that I would've been released from the prison sooner if I told him.' I sighed, finally gathering the courage to look at him. His facial expressions where difficult to see in wolf form, but I could still tell that he wasn't happy. I shifted, his wolf paws still around me. I reached my hand up, stroking his nose, watching as he calmed slightly. "Why won't you tell me anything about our past?" I asked.

'Because it will hurt you.' Mason mumbled.

"I don't care. I want to know."

'I can't tell you. I don't want to hurt you.' 

"I don't care" I repeated. "If I don't know about my past, how am I going to be prepared for my future?"

Mason looked at me before shifting. "I don't want you hurt." Pain filled his eyes as he looked at me. 

He didn't want me hurt? "That's rich coming from an Alpha who snogs just about every female in school." I snap at him, watching him growl.

I removed his arms from me before walking out his room. Urg, I can't even believe I tried. I went straight downstairs and out the house, shifting into my grey wolf. Rae needed to be let out anyway. Howling, I darted off towards the lake, my claws digging up the dirt below me.

When I reached the lake, I dived straight into the water, allowing the cool lake to cool my anger that radiated from me.

Why can't I just be free from this confusion, why can't I know everything? I don't care if it will hurt me, nothing hurts as bad as watching your little sister die in front of your eyes. Nothing is as bad as feeling all the guilt, or cutting yourself because of something you thought was your fault. Nothing helps, not even if someone says that it's not your fault; you always believe that its you.

I saw a black wolf emerge from the tree, along with two brown ones and another grey one. Mason, Jace, Lacey and Leo. Huffing, I crawl out the water and shake off before bowing my head, looking down ashamed. For what? I have no idea, just something I know I didn't do but believe that it's my fault. Leo and Lacey were suddenly by my side, enclosing me in a hug which I quickly crawled out of.

'No, no hugs!' I growled playfully, before Mason and Jace leapt on me, hugging me with their heavy bodies squashing me. I wriggled under them, trying to breath because having two hundred pound K-9's laying on you hurts!

I shifted before climbing up a tree, the rest following. I didn't realize I had been out so long and it was evening, must've woken up late.

"I'm sorry, Skater Girl" Mason said, sitting next to me on the tree branch.

"It's fine. It's my fault." I muttered.

"No, its not. I was wrong to not let you understand your past."

I looked at him and saw honesty in his eyes before I sighed.

"I know that you want to know your past," Leo spoke, "But we can't help you without you being hurt, and that's what we don't want." I nodded slowly, disappointed.

"But," Mason said. "There's a friend of mine that can help you."

I looked up suddenly, my hopes coming to life again, "I'll take you to see her, but she lives at the top of the country. We'll drive up there if you really want to see her."

Lacey nodded, "We can't promise you that it'll be any less painful, but at least you'll understand your past." I smiled at her.

"We'll go a week before your eighteenth, that's when it's easier to get sights of the past for werewolves." Mason sighed, leaning against the tree trunk. I nodded.

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I looked out the window as I sat on my window seat. Its so peaceful outside.

'Wish life was like that.' Raven snickered. I wish. My life would never been peaceful, there's always something around the corner good or bad for me.

I suddenly heard my phone ringtone and rushed over to get the phone. Dad. I froze. They haven't called since they left, something's wrong. They said they probably won't call because most of the time they'd be exploring the area's and the forests.

"Dad?"

I heard my father's heavy breathing before his voice hoarsely came through the speaker.

"R-Rae."

His voice worried me. My Dad never spoke like that. He was always so cheerful and childish with his speaking. It sounded like he was running.

"Dad? What's wrong?" I asked, my voice suddenly panicked.

"Rae... Y-Your mother..."

"W-What" I stuttered.

"S-She's been killed."