An Impossible Love [l.t au]

16.

It doesn't take long for me to tangle my hands in my hair in frustration and scream in annoyance. 

My screams are whispers, so really, there's no effect. 

I didn't know how much I sucked at the English language, but like, I'm pure English? I heard a Shane Dawson conspiracy theory where English classes are actually secretly a different class language which is why it's so hard to some people. It's the language of the aliens. 

Stay with me here. I'm not weird, I'm stating the truth. 

"Mm," Elizabeth catches my attention and points down at her bag of chips. "These...are really good. Where'd you get them?"

I shift my position on my couch. "Halloween last year." 

Her jaw stops moving and she looks at me with a 'really?' look before shrugging and crunching again. 

My insides are eating me limb my limb whole. I'm done with this shit of homework. Exams just passed and we're already getting tonnes of homework. Who has time to write an essay on how soap is made? Yes, that's exactly what it's on. And yes, I did choose the topic, thank you very much. 

Did I also mention that it's due tomorrow and has to be at least ten thousand words? I chose a very bad topic. 

"For God's sake, Alex, just use Grammarly and write whatever you want." Lizzie shrugs. I give her a blank look. 

She makes everything look so easy holy shit why can't I do that?

"You're starting now? Classic." She rolls her eyes with a laugh.

I sheepishly smile. Doing things last minute is kind of what I'm born to do. Procrastination is my talent- don't let people tell you otherwise. 

"Who's starting what last minute?" My dad walks in and waves at Lizzie while looking at me with his eyebrows raised. 

I flash my best smile at him. "Nothing, Daaad." 

"I got some oranges in the kitchen if you guys are hungry. I'm heading out for a bit. I'll be back soon, yeah?" He says, putting his shoes on. 

Elizabeth and I both nod. I let him know that the others might also be coming by but I'm not too sure because they have some fancy dinner to go to for their bands. Guess who was invited but isn't fancy enough to go? Elizabeth. 

I'm just not going because she isn't. 

I haven't told anyone about what happened last week. Mostly because I'm still in shock that it happened. My heart was racing so fast throughout the whole thing, that I couldn't even process what was happening. I know he didn't care that much about what's happening in my life, so I tried keeping it to the minimal. I tried asking him about his life but he'd just...I don't even know. It was weird, man. 

I guess I haven't really told anyone because I knew he wouldn't be going around telling people that he saw me in a cemetery and we had a nice conversation. And I know it's a bigger deal for me so I would technically have the right to tell Brendon, Elizabeth, Sarah and Patrick, but what we talked about was kinda private. Okay, not really. 

Truth is, I was trying to get myself to get over him. But right when I even started to try, things started happening, and I don't want to ruin anything anymore. If I don't talk, it happens. When I talk, it doesn't happen. It's like he doesn't even remember who I am anymore. 

"Do you have any more food? Like, unhealthy food?" I open my mouth to answer, but she waves her hand. "Never mind, I'm going on a diet. Do you want an orange?"

I really hate the smell of oranges for some strange reason. It's not even the citrus like there's just no particular reason why I hate the smell. I love oranges in general, but like the smell- no thank you. 

"Nah, I'm good." 

~*~

Elizabeth left about an hour ago and I decided to go over to Louis' house just for fun. Not for Louis, though, but for Parker. Flora's went out somewhere with her husband and even though Louis'  home, too, Parker said he wants me to come over to play. And really, why not? What else have I got to do with my life?

I'm in the living room sitting down, waiting for Parker to return with his toys. The room looks a lot different than before. The smell of cinnamon is lingering around- probably from the burnt out candle. The couches are positioned differently, they moved their flat screen T.V and everything's organized so much more professionally. It's kinda weird, to be honest. 

"I'm back, Alex! I'll have my favourite truck and you can have my friend's barbie. She forgot it over here, but that's okay she won't mind you using it," Parker says and hands me the nearly naked barbie doll. I have no idea what happened to the pants. 

He lays out the road set that came with the truck and sets out the truck on top. Then, Parker starts counting them before shaking his head and sighing. "I have to go get the other one. I'll be right back! Don't leave!" 

I tell I won't and stupidly sit there with my phone in my hands scrolling through whatnots. You know when you go on Instagram and start stalking some really hot dude? a/n: me with One Direction. Yeah, me with any cute guy, really. Louis doesn't have Instagram, only Twitter but I don't have Twitter- I don't find the point in it- so I'm stuck with other people. 

While I'm sitting in an awkward position, I don't notice that a person sits across from me. Boi, I wish Louis. 

Just kidding turns out it is Louis. 

I slowly trail my eyes over to his face and a bomb of butterflies drops when I see he's looking at me. Shit, he's looking at me. Please don't tell me I'm dreaming. I'm finally going schizophrenic, aren't I? I don't say anything, though. I just continue looking at him, pretty sure my eyes widening with each second passing by. And it's only been like three seconds, so.

"Hi," I squeak. My face is probably pink and that's something to say because I rarely ever blush. 

"Tell me about yourself." He says. You can tell he's fighting back the cold and bitterness in his voice. 

I blink twice. I'm really confused. Why is Louis talking to me? I don't mind, but this is really new. He can say one word and my whole day would just automatically lighten up. Does he have a Bluetooth headset in or...?

"Me?" I ask looking around. 

He rolls his eyes. "No, I'm talking to the couch behind you," His face goes blank and he shrugs. "Tell me about yourself. Don't pretend you haven't been dying for me to ask you this question." 

I sheepishly smile as I blush. Fuck, I never blush what is this boy doing? "Um, there's really not a lot to me." Lies. I've planned this scenario at least a hundred times in my head but I never thought we'd actually get to this. I didn't even think I'd actually get to talk to him. I'm blanking out. Is this even happening?

Louis sighs. "Okay, I'll go first then." 

Go first? Oh god, is it hot in here or is that just me?

"Uh...my name is Louis, as you know," He clicks his tongue and looks around. "My favorite color's red, I have a brother, my birthday's December twenty-fourth...have you caught on?"

I gulp. "Well, yeah, but like- okay. Um, okay." Mentally preparing myself, okay let's go, Alex. "My name's Alex. I'm eighteen. My birthday's November twenty-ninth. I don't really have a favorite color...," I trail off and look at him. 

He nods and Parker runs back. He looks between the two of us and scowls. "Louis! I told you not to steal my friend!" 

Louis half smiles. It's not genuine, but it's not fake either. "Sorry, buddy. I was just making sure she wouldn't kidnap you or anything." 

Parker sets down another truck and we begin playing. Every five seconds I look over at Louis, though, who's now on his phone and still sitting there. 

My breath is still caught in my throat. Wow, I really like him. 

a/n: IM SORRY FOR THE LONG WAIT I'VE BEEN PLANNING THINGS OUT WITH THIS BOOK SO YEAH I HOPE YOU'RE GONNA LIKE IT!!