Colorful | Phan | Completed

78%

Nothing really happens in May for me. Prom would be one to remember, of course. But there were days that went in the collection of the ones I had forgotten, tiny arguments and dreaded school work that was stored in the back of my brain to never be talked about again.

It was a Saturday, late May, when it happened.

A couple hours after my phone call with Phil, I walked downstairs and saw my mother in the kitchen. "Did you talk to Adrian?"

"He said he was going over Troye's." She responded.

"I mean, did he tell you what was so important?"

Mom turned around and furrowed her eyebrows. "No?"

"Oh. He didn't tell me either." Though I didn't give him the chance...

"Call him if you'd like?" Mom suggested. I nodded in agreement and took my phone from my back pocket. I had called him twice, and he never answered.

I didn't start to worry until Phil called me.

"Hey, love." I answered.

"Dan." He sounded panicky. "Come to the hospital."

"Phil, what happened? Are you alright?" I demanded.

"No, not me. Adrian."

"What happened?" I repeated.

"He tried to commit suicide. I wasn't going to take him here, but he was bleeding so much.." His voice cracked.

"I'm coming. Is he alive?"

Phil didn't answer.

"Is he alive?" I questioned louder.

"Yes." He answered..

Mom drove us to the hospital. She cried the entire way.

Phil had greeted us in the waiting room and walked us to my little brother's room. Mom went in first, and I stayed in the hall with Phil.

"I was driving to the grocery store." Phil began to explain. "I recognized him just by his hair. He was standing on the opposite side of the railing of that bridge... The one that goes over the river near your house. So I stood with him, and we were together for a little bit. I asked him what was wrong, and he said nobody cared about him."

I looked down. It had been me who yelled at him in the first place. Phil continued. "I told him I did, but he started to cry. I hopped over the railing and he followed me. I was gonna bring him home, but his arms were drenched in blood. It took me a solid 5 minutes of pleading until he agreed to go to the hospital." I pulled Phil in for a hug.

We stayed like that until mom came out. His fingers running through the back of my hair, my hands gripping onto his shirt.

I held onto the doorknob longer than I wanted to. I didn't have to go in. Really, he'd be better off if he didn't see me. But a voice in my head pushed me through.

Adrian didn't look at me when I stepped in, but I stared him down. His eyes were red and his lips were pressed into a thin line. There were bandages traveling up his arms and under his sleeve. He looked broken, damaged even.

I tried to be light hearted. "We seem to find ourselves here these days." I joked.

He didn't laugh. Neither did I. Stupid.

"Aren't you gonna ask me why?" He questioned.

"Why, then?"

"Nobody cares about me."

"Of cour-"

"'Phil this. Phil that'. Ever since you dissed PJ for Phil, it's been color boy liked this, color boy liked that. 'Color boy is this big beautiful rainbow and I could just burst thinking about him'." Adrian mocked me.

"Ade-"

"I bet you didn't even notice that mom and dad are in a fight."

"They are?"

"Exactly. All they ever do is fight." He sighed. "So mom cries, dad leaves, and you're with Phil again. Seems his colors are blinding you."

"Can we acknowledge the fact that we wouldn't even be having this conversation if it weren't for Phil." I pointed out.

"Lucky me." He sighed.

"Why are you fighting me? I was just on the verge of tears because you were seconds away from death!"

"You're so oblivious, Dan. Oblivious to the world around you. All you see is what can benefit you. Phil makes you happy, PJ doesn't. Bye to him and hello new kid." He grumbled.

"You don't know anything about that."

"News flash: Phil isn't as perfect as you think."

I crossed my arms. "I never said he was perfect. We all have flaws."

"You know what he said to me? On the bridge?"

"What?"

"'I'll show you mine if you show me yours'."