Stitches of Life

Suicide is Painless

Chapter Sixty-Three: Suicide is Painless

"Since the state requires two physicians' signatures, I've asked Dr. Hunt to look over your chart." Teddy explained to her patient, Kim, and Kim's husband, Sean. "Her prognosis says that she has less than six months to live. I have informed her of her treatment options. She has met with a psychologist who has determined that she is mentally fit. And this can serve as her second oral request."

"Okay." Kim nodded through her labored breathing.

"You have to say it." Teddy told her. "Washington state says I have to hear you ask two times at least fifteen days apart."

"It's so weird. It's like I'm applying to die." Kim chuckled.

"Well, if you're having second thoughts-" Sean shrugged.

"You saw how bad it got last night." Kim reminded her husband. "It's just gonna get worse. I would like to end my life through physician-assisted suicide."

"Excuse me. Um..." Hunt excused himself before stepping out of the room, making us all look his way.

"I-I'm just gonna go see what's up." Teddy told us before she followed after Hunt, leaving me with the couple.

"Dr. Watley." Kim looked at me once Teddy was gone. "How long does it take... to die... once I take the barbiturates?"

"Can we not talk about this?" Sean shook his head. "It's just, um... We're not there yet."

"We are there, Sean." Kim gave him a sad smile. "We are."

"Kim, to answer your question, about forty-five minutes." I told her. "It takes about forty-five minutes to die."

"Can I ask you something?" Kim asked through her oxygen mask. I glanced between her and her husband, confused, before I nodded. "Why aren't you like them? Why aren't you... freaking out?"

"Would you rather I be freaking you out and trying to talk you out of it?" I raised a brow.

"That's not what she means." Sean shook his head. "It's just strange that you haven't talked to us about hospice care or possible surgeries to give her more time. That's what most doctors do."

"I guess I just understand where you're coming from, why you're doing this." I shrugged, unsure of what to really say to them. "You don't want to die, but you know that it's gonna happen. So, you want to be able to make one last decision for yourself, to have some sort of power in your death by saving yourself from more pain. I get it."

"Who did you lose?" Kim asked me.

"My mom."

*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*

"Uh, Dr. Altman said you requested to lower your pain meds." Cristina said as she came into Kim's room, where I was looking over her chart once again, having stopped by to check up on her.

"They make me fuzzy." Kim nodded. "I don't want to be fuzzy today. Did she tell you?"

"That you're going home? Yeah." Cristina nodded.

"Oh, I changed my mind." Kim said, making me raise my brows, not having heard this yet myself.

"What?" Sean asked, clearly not having known this either.

"No, no, not about... I just..." Kim sighed. "I want to do it here... in the hospital. I don't want Sean to have to deal with my body afterwards."

"Don't worry about that stuff." Sean told his wife.