Look After You- Niam Horayne

The Start of Therapy-Chapter 13

LIAMS POV

Midnight. Possibly my worst time of day. Every night as the clock strikes twelve, I awake from my deep sleep, just in case Niall had awoken from one of his nightmares. But he hasn't for twelve days which has to be a new record. He was improving so well recently, better than anybody ever imagined. I liked to think that perhaps I was something to do with it, but I never got my hopes up anymore since most of the time, you always got let down.

Midnight was lonely, due to the fact everybody was asleep (hopefully, sometimes you could hear one of the kids whispering to each other or typing at a laptop, although I usually ignore it unless it grazed on my nerves) and I was wide awake. I wanted to stay in Niall's bed but it was hard to refrain from jumping on top of him and ripping his clothes off to continue our session a couple hours ago so I left him as soon as he dozed off.

My room at the Home was boring because I didn't stay here every night, just the nights when I was on an early shift. There were days when I got the day off, but there only being three members of staff was difficult so it was rare to have free time. I didn't complain though, staying away from the kids (Niall) was heartbreaking, even if it was just for a day.

I was bored so I picked up my iPhone from my bedside table and texted Zayn since he was probably awake now playing video games. Harry went to bed really early every night and Louis was probably with his parents.

Hey, Zayn, sorry if my text bothers you at all. Just need some advice.-Liam Payne

I waited about three minutes until my phone buzzed, indicating a new text message.

Hey, Li, no you weren't bothering me. You come before video games, bro. What's the problem?-Zayn Malik

I didn't reply right away, debating whether to discuss this with Zayn. It had nothing to do with the person I was texting, I wasn't sure whether to drop my issues on anyone. Zayn had been my best friend for years, I had no problem with spilling out my emotions with him, especially since if you were in a pickle, he was the gentlest guy you'd ever meet. But... He had no idea what kind of issue I had, and I didn't want to pressure him into giving me advice.

You know what? Just forget it, Z. You're busy.-Liam Payne

But Zayn wasn't having that.

No, I'm always here for you. You know you can tell me anything, right? Don't want to put you under pressure or anything, but you should tell me. It's easier if you spill your issues so I can give you some advice.-Zayn Malik

Okay, thanks, Zayn. It's just... I kissed Niall the other day. It was perfect, so a couple hours ago I started again and it kind of turned into more. It got a little too much, and we both had "little problems", if you get me. I kinda think I'm ruining his innocence. I didn't even think he's kissed anyone before, and I just go ahead and harass the poor kid.-Liam Payne

I could just imagine Zayn chuckling at my stupidity, and it did sound so corny, but it was true. I had just pounced on top of him and almost gave myself away to him. If I hadn't stopped before, I don't know what would've happened. It sounds so dumb, but it'd be so easy giving myself up and taking away his virginity because you could lose control just gazing onto his bright blue eyes, let alone tasting those sweet lips...

Liam, if Niall didn't want you to kiss him or make out with him, he would've protested. Anyway, why didn't you tell me this before? When did you kiss him?-Zayn Malik

I guess so... And my head has been too wound up around my problems than to explain to you, Zayn. I appreciate the help, I really do, but my issues are too big to give me enough free time to text you all the God damn time. I kissed him yesterday. Why does it matter? It was wrong. I could get fired.-Liam Payne