Just like me: phan

Just like me: phan pt62

*Dans pov*

I was now sat at the table opposite Phil, moving my omelette around the plate with my fork...I did plan on eating it , it was just proving difficult, as I had just found out that Matt was either still dead or a main contender in the 'almost death' of Phil. Which, to think about it, could take away anyone's appetite. The immense guilt I had felt for most of the day before could not even compare to the amount of guilt I was feeling in that moment. 

Phil sighed, seeing that I had hardly touched my omelette. I knew he wouldn't be mad if I didn't eat it, but I didn't want to disappoint him like I had so many times before. I cut a piece off with my fork and ate it, just to show Phil that I could. 

'How do you feel when you actually do eat Dan?' He asked, eating the last bite of his own meal.

'Gross' I mumbled, continuing to push the food around my plate. 

'You shouldn't' He shook his head. 'You're beautiful Dan, you should never have been made to think otherwise' He paused, seeing the broken look on my face. 'I'm sorry, it's just- I know I'm not very good to myself either...but it's hard to see you struggle like this over a plate of food, that...should make you happy'

'I know' I nodded, taking another small bite up to my mouth. 'I will eat, Phil, I'm just worried about Matt and-

'Don't think about that right now okay, please just save it for the station later. Don't dwell on it okay? It'll just make you feel worse' Phil pushed his plate to the side, signifying he was done. He then turned his head away staring out the window. Phil wasn't usually like this. I mean, 'save it for the station', that didn't sound like him at all. He always wanted to talk about the things that were bothering me. Which lead me to believe something was troubling him.

'Phil are you alright?' I asked, taking another bite of my omelette, feeling a sense of pride when I saw him smile at me for it.

'Yeah...um' His smile dropped. 'Dan what do you think they're going to do with my leg?' His words were fast, signifying this had been bothering him for a while. The knee, the cause of all this, often pushed to the side, but never left forgotten. It suddenly struck me how hard this all must be for Phil with the added dramas of being partially immobile, I felt an overwhelming sense of sympathy towards him. The last thing I ever wanted for Phil was to for him to lose a limb.

'They won't take it away' I assured. 'I won't let them, don't worry. It doesn't look too bad anymore. I'm sure you'll be fine'  I took another bite of my omelette and smiled at him.

'Okay' He whimpered. 

~ ~ ~

We were now on our way to the hospital, by car, my dad was using the police car so we were able to use his 4 door red sedan, which was great because...well obviously we couldn't walk and I didn't know a bus that ran to the hospital. We were almost there too, Phil had discovered three CDs in the glove box, one of them being 'NOW: 44'. Which contained a mixture of early 2000 hits. To put it quite plainly we were having a great time.

'I can't believe you ate the entire omelette, Dan' He cheered, kissing me on the cheek while changing the song to one from The Backstreet Boys. 'I'm really proud'

'Oh thanks' I blushed, actually feeling good about eating a proper meal for once. 'I't was all because of you though, you know that right?'

'No, Dan it was all you' He reassured.

I pulled into a parking space close enough to the door so that we wouldn't have to walk far, I had gotten Phil to call the doctor, about where we had been and where to meet him, prior to leaving the house. According to Phil, that was Level 4, room 35, appointment under; 'Lester'.

We walked down the hall of the white-walled hospital, children's paintings scattered the area, probably to lighten the mood...they didn't work.  Phil was holding my hand as if he were grasping onto dear life, he was standing so close to me there was barely any space between us, and I wasn't complaining, I was happy that I made him feel a little bit safer, even though I had caused so much damage in the past.

'It's just in here' I announced quietly, stopping outside the room labelled '35'.

Phil nodded and walked in, head down. He sat in one of the two brown leather chairs, in front of him was Dr. Watts, from which we had met two days ago. Seeing him brought back a whole range of feelings and memories, which I had to suppress, because this time wasn't about me, it was about Phil.

'Mr. Lester, Mr. Howell' The Doctor smiled, standing up to shake both of our hands. 'Lovely to see you both again'

I sat down in the seat next to Phil.

'Before get on to checking out your Knee, Mr. Lester, a call came through this morning from your...foster company, just instructing that you report down to the police station after this appointment' Dr Watts stated, while shuffling some paper's as if what he just said wasn't a big deal.

Phil's face went ghost white, he looked like he was about to cry, my heart thumped rapidly. As much as I didn't want to think about what was going to happen once we left this hospital, I couldn't deny reality.

'Wh-what's wrong?' I asked quietly, clutching Phil's hand from under the desk. 

'Oh I wasn't told, Mr. Howell, I think there's a problem with his current home' He said while getting out some medical equipment from under his desk. 'Oh I'm sorry boys, I think I've left my stethoscope in the surgery room, it's just a few doors down' He got up off of his seat and strolled out the door.

'Dan' Phil whimpered, looking up at me. I could now see the surfacing tears he was trying so hard to hide. 'Dont let them take me'