Because of You, Well, Us

Kate

I awoke with a start. My sleep kept being invaded by the recently unwelcome thought of Chase. His playing kept me from falling asleep. He sat under that tree and played for hours. I didn't know if I did it for my sake or his, but I listened anyway. I loved listening to Chase. It didn't take a genius to know I wasn't acting like myself. Everything seemed just so crazy that couldn't figure out the best option.

The ping of satisfaction over noticing the swirling blue lights helped me feel more like myself. Chase had made someone call the cops. It made me smile, but it still upset me that Chase wouldn't stay there to maybe play me back to sleep like he sometimes did years and years ago.

Deep inside, I knew that I did actually like him. I had just read too many stories about how a relationship ruins a lifelong friendship. Chase felt like all I had. I couldn't blow it with him. I wasn't ready. I didn't think I could handle losing my mom and my best friend, even though it felt like he had already left.

Climbing out of bed and opening my curtains, I saw Chase sitting at his desk. Seeing him awake shocked me, given that he had been out until the early hours of the morning. My phone vibrated next to me, seeing as I had forgotten to turn it off, and the screen said I had a text message from Chase. Glancing up, I saw him looking at my expectantly.

My fingers trembled as I reached for my phone and tried to open the message. Reading it took a few times, and it got worse after I had understood it.

"Maybe you aren't ready, but I'll wait for you to be. If any other guys fall for you, I will just keep waiting until you figure this all out, Kate."

I closed the text and my curtain, but not before meeting Chase's eye. Lying back in bed, I pulled the covers over my head and stayed like that for a long time.

The look on Chase's face stuck in my memory the most. His face so full hope and his eyes were shining like I knew they did when he felt really happy. Then just like that, it disappeared when I closed my curtains.

Even after racking my brain, I had no idea what to do. I just knew I had a lot of thinking to do, which meant calling Aunt Shari.