Because of You, Well, Us

Kate

I thought I could hide it and keep the secret of breaking up with Andy from my dad. He loved Andy. Dad wanted him to put a ring on my finger call Andy his son. After our first few dates, my dad didn't even interrogate Andy anymore. I don't know why, but he seemed comfortable around him. I knew he would notice Andy not hanging around, I just didn't think it would so soon. For a week or two, it seemed possible to make him believe Andy was just busy with school and soccer. Then he began to catch on, and once he did, he didn't let it go, no matter how hard I tried to make him leave it alone.

We sat down to dinner one night to silence, like always since my mom had died, but it seemed so much worse now that I didn't want to talk about Andy with my dad. Once we had that topic of conversation, things seemed almost normal, but now that option had gone out the window.

"Soccer ended last week, does that mean you'll hang out with Andy more?" He loved Andy, but refuses to think of me dating someone.

"I'm not sure dad; you'll have to ask him." I said, a sarcastic tone in my voice. I hadn't meant to sound that snarky with my dad, but it came out before I knew what I had done.

"What, why?" My dad's face fell. I didn't want to break his heart, but I also knew that I had to tell him.

"Because he's upset that I didn't beg Princeton to reconsider, and on top of that I chose Yale."

"And Yale is a bad school because?" He drew out

Frustrated, I snapped, "I don't know dad." With that, I ran up to my room and shut the door. I hadn't even finished eating, but Andy's reasoning for breaking it off still frustrated me more than I wanted. Not to mention every time that happened, I thought about how I had kissed Chase when he came over. How I had begged him to come over. I had manipulated him and made him come over.

I tried to study. We had exams soon and I wanted to keep my grades up. Just because I had gotten into my Ivy League school didn't mean I could slack off. When I got AP Chemistry out of the way, I heard the doorbell ring.

"She's upstairs Andy, go on up." How ironic, when I tell my dad I broke up with someone, the guy comes back.

I heard a light knock on my doorframe. I turned to find Andy leaning against it, slight smile on his face. He looked like he hadn't slept well as of late, but a part of me didn't care. He had broken up with me, so he deserved to feel like shit. Without even being invited in, Andy walked through the doorway and sat on my bed, and I noticed a letter in his hand. His face appeared almost more bewildered than mine. Then Andy broke out in a smile. He shoved the letter in his hand towards me. The letter looked big, thick, and from Yale. He had gotten in.

"I'm going. I changed my mind. I'm going to Yale. With you."

"Really?" I asked handing it back to him.

Andy grabbed my hands and sat me down in the bed next to him. "Kate, I'm sorry. I acted like such a jerk towards you. I shouldn't have acted so immature and stupid like that. You're going to Yale for you. Not because of Chase. You two don't even talk anymore. It all seems so stupid now." He had an earnest look on his face, and he tucked a loose curl behind my ear. "Do you forgive me?" Never even letting me respond, he kept bringing his face closer to mine until he kissed me.

In the time we'd spent apart, I'd forgotten how good it felt to kiss Andy. His lips felt soft against mine, thanks to chis lip balm addiction, and his hands seemed gentle as he caressed my neck. We'd never slept together in the time we had dated, we'd never even talked about it. So when Andy started running his hands up my legs and prodding my mouth open with his tongue, I knew I needed to call it quits.

"No." I said, pushing him away a bit

"No what?" He asked.

"I don't forgive you. I can't be with you. I'm sorry, but I can't just sit here and let you potentially flip flop between Princeton and Yale. I can't do that to myself, and you shouldn't do that to yourself either." I got up and held the door open. Andy tried to get me to stay on the bed with him, but I twisted out of his grip.

"Ah. I see now." Andy's voice got angry. I'd never really been with him when he felt angry. There were times after a tough soccer game that he'd taken some stuff to heart, but never like this. "This is about Chase, like always. You do have feelings for him." Andy strolled out into the hallway. He didn't even look back at me before he left, and there was a part of me that didn't even care.

"So what if I do?" I didn't hear what he said as I shut the door.

Did I still have feelings for Chase?