The Mark of an Alpha {Book 1}✔

Fourteen

I used to think that love was overrated, but that is not true.

I loved my father. He was my protector. The person that would give me the moon and the stars.

I love Andrew. He is my brother, my best friend. He would stand by me when the world is against me.

Love is not overrated, falling in love is the overrated part.

Everyone thinks that falling in love is so magical. Falling for the person that you will spend the rest of your life with is our life's purpose.

Well, I started falling and I ended up smacking onto the concrete ground.

Marcus was my person. My mate.

The person that you were taught that would not hurt you—did that.

Everyone talks about finding your mate, but no one talks about what to do when they reject you. What happens when they walk away from you.

No one talks about the pain that stabs you in the heart, unexplained, unprovoked, and the most hurtful because it blindsides you and kills you bit by bit. This pain can bring anyone to their knees— the pain I am enduring at the moment.

He might have been gone but the fact that he is out there somewhere brings hope to my wolf.

"Marcus, you can't do this!"

The words ring loud in my mind. When Marcus left I refuse to step foot into my bedroom. We have too many memories plastered on my walls.

Andrew shared his room, his only form of privacy, with me. Pillows drench in tears and sweat as I awaken every hour by nightmares just to find it to be my reality.

Andrew decided that we both needed some rest so he slept in my room.

He stayed there for two nights when I decided my misery did not need his company. Andrew tried to fight me as I ordered him away.

Andrew tried to comfort me but this pain is not a quick fix. Darkness fills my mind as the hole in my chest is a void I cannot fill.

He is my best friend. The one that I can count on when I am all alone. His mere presence somewhat chases away the darkness but he cannot be with me all the time.

At the moment I know that he needs time to heal as well. He is hurting and I am being selfish thinking that I am the only one affected by the death of our alpha and he has momentarily lost his best friend.

I fight with sleep every moment of every day. Sleep is always accompanied by dreams or nightmares.

My life seems in a constant loop of rounds, searching, and unfortunately, sleep when my body is on the verge of losing it.

Exhaustion floods my mind.

Dreams are the only reason why I have hung on. Every dream starts with Marcus being here. Here with me. His arms wrapped around me as he holds me. Safe and loved until the dark cloud looms above us and my dream turns into a nightmare ending with him running away.

Marcus stands at the door as I ask him to stay. To stay with his mate. Every dream ends with him signing our death certificate.

"No!" My eyelids flutter open as the blurry mess before I start to focus as my lit room seeps into my irises and my heaving breath lifts me off my bed.

My eyes widen as they take in the familiar white bare walls of my once colorful bedroom. My gaze falls on my floor lamp light is on as annoyance seeps into me. I cannot even remember to turn off the light when I cry myself to sleep.