His Sunshine, Gabrielle

our cliff of love

Gabrielle Marie Dasher

     Ocean Ridge's Cliff, the cliff where no one in this town ever been on or seen because they found no beauty in it.The first day Carter brought me to the cliff I was left starstruck. Nothing compared to the view I had on this cliff.Nothing compared to the person I shared this cliff with.And nothing compared to our cliff because it was the most beautiful thing that I was proud to call mine.And no matter how much I say I hated Carter Rivers and say that I want nothing to do with him, one thing will always keep us together and it's this cliff.

   "Why are we here?" I asked softly.I love this place so much, but it was the least place I wanted to be at especially with him here.

      Carter sat on a rock, instanly making me nervous because he picked a rock with his back up against the air.Carter has jumped off this cliff so many times, but it always made me nervous when he jumped without me incase he would get hurt.I however sat on a rock with my back facing a tree, in attempts to put distance between us.

    "I just want to talk." Carter said calmly, but I knew what was coming wasn't going to be calm.I couldn't be in the same place as him for even five minutes before we started either arguing or crying.

    "Fine, what do you want to talk about?" I asked rubbing my temple, already feeling a headache coming on.

  

    "Us." He spoke and I felt my stomach churning slightly.I looked at his face,but he was looking down as if he were preparing himself for something.I looked away the second he looked up, embrassed that I was caught staring, but it would of been even worse making eye contact with me.

   I looked behind him, which was the beautiful view that I so much adored.The sky was a mix of orange, pink and speckled of baby blue.The morning sky and the sunset are probably the most lovely skies to watch from here.

   "Why won't you look at me?" Carter asked, sounding strong in his words except I could see from the corner of my eye the way he twirled his fingers around.

    "Because if I do then everyday I spent trying to hate you will go to waste." I admit, feeling that little tingle in my nose signify that I want to cry. I really couldn't look at him, if I did I would cry, scream, kiss him and I would only realize that I will never stop loving him.

    "Then look at me because I don't want you to hate me when I love you so much." He spoke, trying to get my attention, but instead he got my anger.

   "How can you say you love me when you broke up with me.Y-you made me trust you and you broke my heart just like everyone said you would. " I snapped, crossing my arms over my chest that was ready to burst from the pounding inside. My face was getting hot and my body began to shake slightly.

   "I messed up" He whispered, "I know that it sounds cliche, but I messed up.I wasn't thinking about anything except the anger that I felt and I'm sorry for being the worst boyfriend ever, but I love you and that is something that can never change through everything we go through."

    I'm not sure what to think.There was this battle inside of me and I wanted it to just end.I didn't want to feel so lost anymore.I just felt so much pain in my chest when ever he is near me and when I look at his eyes I feel myself forgiving him, but he didn't deserve my forgiveness. No one who has caused pain to me deserved forgiveness because then that meant I had to forgive Trey, my dad, my brothers, Daniella and anyone who is the reason I am the person I am today.

    "You hurt me." I said in a shaky voice, looking at the sky in attempts to hold back my tears, "You broke up with me as if you didn't even feel anything. And I don't even want to forgive you because I don't want to feel like this again." I confess.