You're My Person (Book 1)

4- What I want

Richelle's POV:

I haven't been able to dance for three days and I already hate life without it. I sit in class, longing to be able to show everybody how much better than them I am. I mean sure, they're all good, but I think that with my help, they could really be special. Noah learnt that from me. He will never admit that he did, but he definitely did.

Not only have I been sat in, watching practice, whilst simultaneously doing some homework, but I have had to see Piper take over from me. I don't like admitting it, but Piper is pretty and a technical dancer. There's nothing about Piper that would make Noah run away. It scares me. I thought I would always be his first girl, despite all the changes, but she's stolen him as if she couldn't care less about me.

I carry on writing notes for each individual dancer once I'm finished with my school paper. I write notes about technique, precision, flow, emotion and tricks. I write the most about Noah. At the end, I hand the sheets in to Emily-who reviews them for tomorrow. She awards me as the student of the day, which I take. I smile, excitedly, but everyone is confused. Emily then explains that my dedication to this team is critical. I agree.

I don't remember when I first came home to silence anymore. For a while I was freaked out and annoyed by it, but now it's comforting. My parents both work long hours and I'm an only child. They used to foster, but when we moved house, we left that life behind. We didn't have enough room,time or money to comfort ourselves,let alone another stranger. Now, I am greeted by the door slamming and I head upstairs to sort myself out. Once I am done, I go to the living room. We have a starry ceiling, which I like to gaze at when I'm anxious. It's calming.

My parents won't be home until early morning so I settle in. I am not, however, expecting company. A knock on the door tells me someone awaits my presence. And that special knock belongs to Noah. We made it up when we were best friends. It was to alert anyone who was in the house that an adventure was  about to occur. Now it only alerts me to answer it.

"Special delivery." He says, although he isn't carrying any pizza or food.
"It's me!" He jokes. It doesn't feel like a joke to me. He hasn't been around in months. It does feel pretty special having him here now. I observe as he stands in the doorway, pulling out a small box from his backpack.
"And I brought food." I raise my eyebrows at him in question. How did he know what I wanted?
"They're quick meal, but I figured you wouldn't mind." He's babbling now. I realise I haven't let him in yet. I motion with my hand for him and he enters, making himself at home. He sorts out the plates and food. It's almost like he's a professional. He begins to make small talk with me, but I'm still baffled.
"So how have you been? I know with your injury and everything, it must be hard." Hard enough that you got a girlfriend, I think.
"You must need to rest. Go sit down, I'll bring it to you. Don't worry about having it in the front, I'll clear up." I can't speak. I don't know what to do.

Noah returns a few minutes later with my meal before heading back to get his. He enjoys his meal, like always, but I mainly just play with mine. Then, he looks at me. It's intense.
"When did you last eat, Richelle?" It hits me. I haven't eaten since food was provided for me at dance three days ago. I meant to, but with everything going on, I just didn't.
"Richelle! You need to remember to eat! If you need it, I will personally come around to your house every single night to make sure you do." He's being serious. How can he be freaking serious right now!?
"Well?" My head is turning. I have no idea how to respond. This is so unlike me. I eventually decide on simple but cruel.
"Shouldn't you be hanging with Piper everyday? Considering she is your 'girl of the week.' Don't you think?" He sighs. Then rolls his eyes. He is silent.

Noah left the room. He went somewhere on a phone call. I don't know where or who to, but I can make my guesses. He comes back with an emotionless expression.
"I'm bored of this." That's all he says. I could ask, but what use does it make? He is bored of me. I can tell he's annoyed with me. Especially, after what I said.
"I'm just bored. Of this. Of her. Of pretending." He begins to fiddle with a loose string.
"I don't want it to be this way. I don't want to come between you and Piper, but what I'm doing is selfless. I don't have to do this Richelle. You can tell me that." I nod, but I have no idea what's going on. This is all in some kind of code I've yet to discover. I make my choice.

I wave to Noah as he leaves. He smiles at me, but I feel terrible. I feel like I'm ruining his life just by existing. Him and I were best friends. Emphasis on the were. Because if we are now, then that leaves me with no choice but to actually talk to him and I can't do that. Elliot would hate me. Maybe that's what I want. I don't know anymore.

Elliot and I have been the power couple, we've seen it all. But I want more now and I'm afraid that Noah's my destiny? I can't love a heartbreaker. Elliot has to be my person! No matter how much it hurts. He has to be!

A/N: So as you can tell, my schedule has been a little more all over the place and my updates have been pretty sparse. This is because of how busy I've been. However, I've got a break now and I'm back here to write! I hope you like this chapter, it's honestly one of my most favourites I've ever wrote.
Thanks for reading x