Chapter 23.

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I left the hospital early next day after a long sleepless night where everything I could think of was Alec. I hated myself for causing him pain so much pain that he doesn't deserve. Isabelle has been keeping me updated on how he's doing and when she found out that I was at the hospital because I was stupid enough to stay outside for too long in the freezing weather, she promised me that she and Maryse would get me out of there since I needed a parent/adult to sign me out. I won't lie, both Izzy and Maryse was angry at me at first but when I told them the truth about what happened, they told me that they would try to talk to Alexander since he refuses to talk to me. At the moment, I was laying sprawled out across the couch in the apartment that I share with my stepfather, watching some crappy television. Isabelle and Maryse has dropped me off here after they had signed me out from the hospital and before they left, they both hugged me and made sure that I knew that everything was going to be all right. Trust me, I wanted to believe them more than anything, but there's no way that Alec ever will open up to me again. The worst part about all of this is that it wouldn't have happened if Raphael didn't open his stupid mouth in the first place. Fine, I can understand that he feels betrayed by me because ever since Alexander and I started to work on the project together, I started to spend more time with him and I guess that Raphael got jealous. It doesn't matter though because no matter how jealous he got or how replaced he felt, Raphael had no rights to bully Alec and tell him all the awful things that he told him. God, I can't even imagine how broken Alec must be at the moment. It breaks my heart to know that he's probably laying in his bed, crying his eyes out only because I was an idiot. I decided to try to think about something else so I took up my phone from my pocket and started to scroll through Instagram. At first, I only saw the same boring accounts that posted irrelevant pictures of their breakfast or something like that, but when my eyes suddenly came across a picture of Camille and Ragnor, I felt how my whole world came crashing down. I was still not over the fact that the only women I ever have loved cheated on me with my best friend. Camille was my first relationship and no matter how much I want to hate her because of what she did, I can't. The fear of looniness has always been my Achilles heel and even though I knew that Camille didn't love me while we were together, I couldn't break up with her. She was the best thing that ever happened to me after my mother died and I knew that I always could come to her house when my stepfather returned back drunk to our apartment. Somehow, I'm happy that Camille cheated on me because it became almost like a wake up call for me that she wasn't the person I thought she was. Besides, she was always a douche towards me every time we were fighting and one time she even called me a whore, claiming that I could get together with whoever I wanted to since I was bisexual and all. I took one last look at the picture and threw away my phone while tears streamed down my cheeks.
- What did I do to deserve all of this pain? I whispered and felt how my breathing started to hitch
The apartment was quiet and the only thing that could be heard was the sound of my heavy breathing and the faint talking from the television. My stepfather wouldn't be back until later tonight, if he doesn't get too drunk and passes out in the park on his way home for the hundred time. Honestly, I don't get what my mother saw on him when they met for the first time. He's nothing more than a huge disappointment who can't go one day without drinking. Then again, it probably runs in the family to fall in love with the wrong person. When the tears finally had stopped making their way down my cheeks, I decided to take a shower since I still could smell the hospital scent on my body. I stood up from the couch and walked into the bathroom where I stripped out of my clothes and stepped under the shower. The hot water felt amazing against my body that still felt incredible cold after everything that happened. When I finally felt satisfied, I turned off the water and stepped out of the shower and wrapped a towel around my body. Twenty minutes later I stood in the middle of my room, dressed in a pair of great sweatpants and a black shirt, reading the text message that I had received on my phone from Isabelle when I had picked it up from the floor in the living room.
"Alec is on his way over to your apartment. I told him everything that you told me earlier today and he wants to talk to you -Izzy"
When I had read the message, it felt like my heart stopped beating. Was Alexander on his way over here? Does this mean that he believes in me? I didn't r ally get the chance to mentally freak out because only seconds later, a loud knock was heard on the front door.

//TBC\\

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