High School // Malec

Chapter 43.

The key to being happy is knowing that you gave the power to to chose what to accept and what to let go. I have finally decided to accept the fact that I won't ever able to wake up in a bed where Magnus isn't laying beside me and I have also decided to let go of the fear of being who I am. When I found a guy attractive for the first time in my life, I was disgusted by myself. At that time, I thought that something was terrible wrong with me and that I needed some serious help, but I know better now. I'm gay and I'm damn proud over it. I won't ever give someone the pleasure to mock me again only because I don't have the sexuality that is considered to be normal. I like boys and no matter what stupid thing that might happen in my life, I'll always like boys. One thing that I have learnt is that difficult roads often leads to beautiful destinations and that couldn't have been more true. My whole life has been a difficult road, like a rollercoaster, but I can proudly say that it was worth it. I would go through it all again if it meant that Magnus would be mine. He's honestly the best thing that ever happened to me and I really can't believe that he forgave me after what I yelled at him the day Max died. I know that I'm still making up for it and know that it's going to take some time to fully gain Magnus trust again, but I won't ever stop fighting for his love. I have lost my baby brother and I would never survive losing the love of my life too. My mother once told me that when you love what you have, you have everything you need and honestly, I couldn't have said it better myself. My thoughts were interrupted when I felt how someone breathed against my neck. I turned around in my bed where I had been laying awake for longer than I can remember and when my eyes came across a sleeping Magnus, I couldn't help myself but smile. He looked absolutely adorable with his raven black hair that hung over his face and his pink lips that I enjoy kissing more than anything. When the two of us finally had stopped embracing each other yesterday after Magnus had told me that he would stay in New York, Magnus decided to stay the night, which I really didn't mind. We had been away from each other for way too long time that one more night apart almost felt impossible.
- I love you, I whispered and placed a soft kiss on his forehead
I could slowly see how my actions brought a small smile to his lips and before I knew it, Magnus opened his beautiful eyes and looked at me.
- Good morning, he said with a hoarse voice and the small smile didn't leave his pink lips once
- Good morning, I answered
I won't lie, it felt more than amazing to be this close to Magnus again. His body heat always makes me feel a lot calmer, almost like all of my anxiety and stress suddenly disappears
- Can I kiss you? I asked quietly, scared that he would punch me away
- You don't have to ask if you can kiss me. I'm craving your lips just as much as you're craving my lips, Magnus answered and smiled
Instead of answering, I pressed my lips against his in a passionate kiss, not scared that he would push me away anymore after what he just said. Magnus quickly kissed me back and before I knew it, his body was on top of mine and my arms were thrown against his neck, pulling him even closer than humanly possible.
- I don't think you understand how much I have missed this, I said when the two of us broke the kiss for air
- I have missed this too, Magnus answered and dragged his hand through my raven black hair
We continued kissing until my lips almost started hurting, but I didn't want to stop. I knew that this make out session wouldn't leave to sex, mostly because I'm not ready for taking such a big step yet, but I still didn't mind. Magnus lips was like I drug that I had gotten addicted to and I never want to lose this amazing feeling of being high because of a pair of lovely lips.
- Can I ask you something? I said when we broke the kiss once again
- Of course
- I was wondering if I could come with you to Indonesia and grab your things? I don't think I can stand being without you again, I said and tried to hide my extremely blushing tomato face against his warm neck
- Alexander, I would love if you came with me to Indonesia, Magnus answered and I could practically hear the beautiful smile on his lips
- Good, I said and smiled to myself
The day pretty much went by like this. No one of us wanted to leave the comfort of my comfortable bed and since we didn't have anything better to do today, staying in bed wouldn't be a problem. // TBC \\