The Fire In Me (Ryder) (COMPLETED) 1 ✔️

Chapter Forty-One A Little Misunderstanding

Amnesia- Five Seconds of Summer

     "He what?!" She screams into my ear. I pull the phone back a little so my eardrums don't burst, giving her time to calm down, instantly getting a small headache from her yell. Does she always have to scream? What is even the point of screaming, it makes you sound like a wuss. Sam isn't a wuss, well, if she is, she's a wuss who was brave enough to dye Sierra's hair pink, but cowardly enough to let me take the blame for it. I sigh before I put the phone back to my ear. It's not that big of a deal, she doesn't have to scream in my ear. I roll my eyes as I roll onto my back on the bed and look up at the ceiling.

     "I am not going to repeat it." I say, shaking my head. I knew she couldn't see me, but doing the motion made me feel better for some reason. It made it feel like she was here, and not at her house, away from me, but still, she didn't have to ask that. She heard as clear as day what I said and there was no need for me to repeat something like this. This was important and Dallas could be on the other side of the door listening, no- except he's not... he hasn't talked to me since yesterday. Okay, more like I haven't talked to him. I am scared for some reason.

     The only person who ever told me they loved me was Jay. Maybe I am just scared that Dallas will turn out to be like Jay, which somewhere in my head, I know won't be true... but it is a possibility. A possibility that I have to think about. That I had to plan for. I shake my head. How is Dallas anything like Jay? Well- don't answer that. "He broke up with Sierra?" She asks me and I nod before I realize again that she can't see me. I really hate that we can't talk about this in person. It would be so much easier. I wouldn't have to speak as much.

     "Yeah, that's what I said." I say flexing my wrist before rolling onto my stomach and staring at the bed sheets under me. What else could I stare at? The closed-door? The window that is covered with curtains? The ceiling? I've already stared at that. The floor? I wasn't even about to do that. Why would I stare at the floor? To watch bugs run by? Cockroaches? Beatles? Spiders? Snakes? Okay maybe not snakes, but still. Staring at the floor is a big no-no. I'd rather be thinking there are no bugs in here thank you very much. I look at my fingernails before shamefully hiding them from my view as I hear her let out a breath.

     "Well, it's about time." She says almost exhaustedly. What was that supposed to mean? It's about time. What is it about time for? I mentally groan as I look around the room for something to stare at. What am I supposed to do if I can't find anything to stare at? I shiver. Use my imagination? I shiver again before shaking my head at myself. You're so childish Ryder. You're just figuring this out? You're me and you're just figuring this out? Wow, I need to pay more attention to me. I don't even know me as much as I thought I did... and I already forgot what I was thinking about.

     "I guess." I mutter as my stomach growls and I freeze. Well. I haven't been out of this room because I'm scared to see Dallas, so it's not like I prepared for this. I didn't pack food or drinks in here like I should ha- wait a second. I crawl to the edge of my bed and lean over, peeking under it. Ah ha! I grab the bag of original lays chips and pull it onto the bed before staring at it, contemplating on opening it or not. Technically, this wouldn't count as real food.

     "So what happened after that?" She asks and I poke the bag of chips as if waiting for it to explode, to disappear, maybe even to jump up and smack me across the face. Nothing happens and I relax, still staring at it like my life depended on it. To be honest, unless Dallas or my father came in the room and brought me some food anytime soon, my life did depend on this. Wait. Is my father even still here? Why would he be living in Dallas's apartment too? That'd just be weird. I shake my head, I'm off-topic here. Anyway, my life depends on this bag of original lays chips. Beautiful chips. I lick my lips hungrily as I stare down at the bag.